Friday, May 27, 2016

Music and Mumblings...

Sitting here relaxing tonight but my mind is going ninety to nothing.  So, I’m “writing it out” which is always a good thing for me.  I love to write and I can get a little wordy but isn’t that what authors do?

So, where to start tonight? 

Dr. Wayne Dyer.  He was an author and he said that if you do what you love, everything else will follow.  I believe him.  I  read all of his books and he never said anything that didn’t make complete sense to me.  He made me feel hopeful and good about myself and my spiritual path, which seemed to mirror his.  He transitioned last year and I sure miss his daily writings and reading him on Facebook and sharing his sage words of wisdom and motivation.  He may be on the other side but he is still here with me, a part of me because of the way I view life and because of how he touched my spirit.

He wrote about “manifesting your destiny” and I am working hard to manifest the destiny that I want in my final years before I, too, transition.  Before I can manifest, I have to get clear about what it is that I want.  Right now I am exactly where I need and want to be but I am dreaming and working toward manifesting the destiny I am dreaming.

I’m sitting here on my sofa on this Friday night and my little Chihuahua, Paco, is licking my leg right now which makes me giggle.  I love that little rascal so much.  He was, and is, one of my miracles.  I can’t honestly say I was expecting that miracle but God knows best and he brought him into my life and I’m so glad I was open to that miracle.  I’ve got a cold beer and I’m listening to Van Morrison radio on Pandora as I write.  Rambling Man by The Allman Brothers Band is playing and anyone that knows me knows that I absolutely love The Allman Brothers Band and Gregg Allman was supposed to be my next husband but he just never got the word.  “Blue Sky” playing now from the “Dreams” album.  Seems appropriate because I’m all about dreaming these days.

I’ve been divorced for 23 years now so I’ve been single almost as long as I was before I got married.  I was 25 and ready to be a wife and mother.  It was a dream and it happened.  Although I’m divorced I can honestly say I still love my ex-husband and we are good friends.  He is remarried and I like his wife and I am so happy that we can all be friends and have family get-togethers without any uncomfortable feelings.  We had our time and then, as Gregg Allman sang…it was time for moving on. We were together 20 years and three children came out of that time together and now we have seven grandchildren to share.  It was a good dream and I'm glad it became a reality.

Before the last two songs, “Landslide” by Stevie Nicks played.  That’s the song my son chose for us to dance to when he got married and I can’t hear that son without getting a little heart-twinge for so many reasons.  I was honored he chose that song and my son is one of my many, many blessings in this life.
I feel fortunate to have had, and still have, so many of my good friends in my life. “For What It’s Worth” by Buffalo Springfield playing now.  So much of my life I can relive in an instant just by hearing a song.  My life has been filled with music and it’s hard to separate living and music.  It’s a “my generation” thing I think.
Like I said, my mind is going ninety to nothing tonight and I’m bouncing around all over the place here, aren’t I.  Do you ever do that?

Since this is a 3-day weekend because Memorial Day is Monday, I’m going to spend time with my friends that live up in Dahlonega for the weekend.  I feel a little guilty because there is so much yard work and house work that needs to be done but I wouldn’t miss spending time with my friends because, at this point in my life, I realize the importance of not putting those things off. 

Three people who were very important in my life passed away last year.  My Mom, a dear friend and the person I thought was the love of my life.  I hadn’t seen my friend in a while and I’d always “been meaning” to call her and get together and then it was too late because she was gone.

“Can’t you see” by The Marshall Tucker Band from the “Searchin’ for a Rainbow” album playing now.  Wow, so much good music on this Van Morrison station.  Can you remember where you were when you first heard that song?  I can.  I remember a waterbed that the heater had gone out on and sleeping on blankets that would slip off and I’d be freezing my butt off by morning or so snuggled up next to Tim you couldn’t get a pin between us.  Good memories!

Anyhow, I’ve decided not to let an opportunity to spend time with a friend pass me by.  I’ve been on the go for the past five weeks and next weekend I’m promising myself a “down” week end when I catch up on some of the things I’ve been letting slide but I’ll think about that tomorrow, or next week or maybe I won’t even think about it until next Saturday or Sunday.  There are more important things to think about right now.

“If I Ever Needed Someone” by Van Morrison playing now.  It speaks to my heart and makes me want to get up and close my eyes and sway with the music.  His voice always does that to me.  Beautiful, instense, passionate Van Morrison.  There’s no one current who can compare.

“The Weight” by The Band now.  I guess listening to “my music” makes me remember my youth and the dreams of my youth.  I’m no longer young but I feel like I’m about to graduate again.  Retirement is a couple of years down the road and big changes are coming for me.  Good things are happening and every day I expect a miracle and I’m not disappointed. 

So, with that having been said, I’m going to get up and start doing a little light housekeeping and getting my stuff together to take off with Paco tomorrow.  My sister lives in the house right next to me and my neighbor on the other side is always watching my house AND I ALWAYS put a big bubble of Light around my house whenever I go away to protect it but I leave with no fear knowing I have people I trust looking out for me and for my home.

“Fortunate Son” by CCR playing now.  Takes me back to the days when I became an anti-war protestor, not that it did any good.  There’s more war in this world today than ever and it breaks my heart.  I still want to believe that we can all love each other and live in peace but I don’t see it happening in my lifetime.  It’s Memorial Day on Monday and I honor all those who served and if I let myself think on it too much, my heart gets heavy.  I don’t think I want to go there now.

I feel fortunate to have been born in the time and the place I was born.  Life has been good.  It hasn’t always been easy and I wouldn’t want it to be because if you don’t have sadnesses and make mistakes, how can you grow as a human being?  I believe I came here to grow spiritually.  I’m working on that every day.
I say good-night now while “Hotel California” by the Eagles is playing.  Oh California!  So many memories there but that’s for another day.

Expect a miracle and give thanks when you get it! Namaste everyone.

Don't Stop Dreaming!

Oh boy, do I have a dream. 

I'm a couple of years from retirement but I have started dreaming and planning for that day.  It is bubbling up inside of me and I feel like I am about to pop so I've decided I need to "write it out."

Having moved, often, in my life, I set a couple of life goals for myself.  One was to own my own home and I do.  One was to live in the same house for 10 years and as of September 2015, I reached that goal.  Another was to work at the same job for 5 years and as of May 23rd, 2016, I reached that goal, too.

Now, I'm ready for a new goal, a new dream.  I want to travel across the United States in a Little Guy pulled behind a small SUV I've yet to buy.  Well, I've yet to buy either but I've started dreaming and that's the first step to manifesting the reality.  I'm ready to sell my house and live free of debt and responsibility. But first, I have two more years of work ahead of me which should be just enough time to get my ducks in a row.

I'll blog more about my process because there is SO MUCH to be done before I hit the road with Paco, my little Chihuahua.  He will be an awesome traveling companion.

Also, after 23 years of being single, I feel like there's one last love in store for me and I will meet him when I hit the road.  He's there and I know it will be magic when we meet.  Hold on, I'm coming!

With that having been said, it's time for me to get back to my job! 


Saturday, October 17, 2015

Wine, Women and Writers

Wine, Women and Writers
Below is a post that I meant to put up on September 25th and here it is October 18th already.  I have been busy writing and creating and that has kept me busy but I do want to get back to writing this blog more regularly.

I've been thinking about what someone said to me because it has bothered me and I have to go deep to understand why.  He said "you are living in the past."  I guess it bothered me because it is partly true. I have vivid memories of the past which I hold close so I don't forget them because I want to write about them and hope that maybe someday, my experiences will resonate with others and help them in some way to be better or to have a better life or feel better about themselves. Also, I hope my children and grandchildren will read my words and see me as a person and not just Mom or Meme (what my grandchildren call me) because although I AM those things and love being Mom/Meme but I want them to someday see a more complete picture of a woman living, loving, laughing, hurting, crying, sad, the full gamut of emotions and experiences.  When they read my words, it is THE PAST and I will be living there because the past holds pieces of us.

I also live in the FUTURE because I have dreams and goals and places I want to go and see and people I want to visit and all of them are in the future and some may not happen but a lot of them will.  I do believe that if I "put it out there" (dream it) it will happen, in some way.  Not always as I foresee but I get what I want when I am clear about it.  I think this is healthy and a good way to positive self-project.

I also live in the RIGHT NOW.  I am aware of all of my senses as I write this blog.  I can smell the oil I put on when I got out of my shower a few minutes ago.  I can hear a bird singing outside my open window.  I can see this screen and the words forming as I write and they are transferred from my thoughts into something more concrete.  I can feel the keys as I type.  I can (almost) taste the eggs and grits I'm going to make for breakfast when I finish this post.

I think what bothered me the most about his statement was that I let what he thought create insecurity in me. I LET his words be a truth, for a moment.  However, I KNOW there is so much more to me and it makes me a little sad that he doesn't see it but that's his stuff and not mine.  So, I've thought about and I have come to the conclusion that he is right but he is also so very WRONG.  I am a 3-dimensional person and I live in the past, the present and the future and that's a very GOOD thing, don't you think?

Anyhow, that's it for this morning.  It is a GREAT day to be alive in America.  The sun is shining, the temperature is perfect and after breakfast, I am going to have some fun doing those things that I need and want to do and completely enjoying, on all levels, this gift of a day.  I expect a miracle! And so it is.

September 25, 2015 – “Wine, Women and Writers”

On a rainy Thursday night at 6:30pm, September 24, 2015, our newly formed writer’s group, which we are calling Wine, Women and Writing, held it’s first meeting at Sabe’s Place in Historic Downtown Buford, Georgia. 

First, we discussed the organization and schedule of our little group which consisted of Lynn and 2 Sabra’s.  Yes, 2 Sabra’s.  Sabra B. and Sabra R.  Mallorie will be at the next meeting but she wasn’t feeling well last night and maybe another writer named, Judy.  My friend, Tracy, will probably be a drop in from to time.  Among the three of us attending last night, we agreed that we want to keep the group small and intimate.

Lynn and I drank Champagne while the other Sabra drank water.  She’s more of a writer than a wine drinker but me, I can go either way! If we are going to call our group, “Wine, Women and Writer’s” we have to drink some wine, don’t we?

It was my idea to form a Writer’s Group and something I’ve wanted to do for a couple of years.  Part of the reason I wanted to have a Writer’s Group is to help me become more focused on my writing and if I can help other people along the way then a good thing has happened, as far as I am concerned.  I researched “Starting a Writer’s Group” online and found a wealth of information.  I have been in several writing groups over the years and I had an idea of how I wanted the Writer’s Group I formed to be and now I have manifested exactly what I wanted.  It is a great little group and I know we will learn from and help each other and grow from this experience.

We each shared something we had written.  Sabra B. and Sabra R. shared poetry while Lynn shared a “slice of life” piece she had written.  Through our writing we learned a little more about each other and I look forward to exploring with these women in the months and maybe years ahead.  I think we have great potential and we have enough similarities to enjoy each other’s company and enough differences to challenge each other and help each other grow.

I shared the extent of my journals and they were suitably impressed.  I didn’t share the content but the volume.  I have written journals for years and I do it, in part, for posterity so that someday, my grandchildren and great-grandchildren will be able to read my journals and to know me and know how life was during the time I am alive because the rate of change is happening so much faster than it did between my time and my Grandmother’s time.  I can only imagine the world of my great-grandchildren but I have no doubt it will be significantly different in some ways but exactly the same in others.   I also write for my children because I am the keeper of the “stories” of their lives, whether they know it now or not.  I am sure it will be more meaningful to them when I have transitioned.

We concluded the evening with cheese, crackers, dips and fruit.  Around 9:30pm, Sabra B. and Lynn each left with their hand outs (and “homework”) to help prepare for our next meeting in two weeks.  It was a fun, productive evening of “Wine, Women and Writing!”

Sunday, October 4, 2015

Ovid's "Metamorphoses: XV" - Speaking of Death and Time

Time is something we never seem to have enough of and death is something that awaits us all.  Both have been on my mind this morning.  It is Sunday and my weekend is almost over and then it is back to work tomorrow and there was so much more I wanted to accomplish in my "two days off" but here it is, Sunday afternoon, and I'm just getting around to doing some of what should have already been done.  I need more time!

Death is something I've had coming  up in almost every single month of this year.  Friends are passing on.  Family and people I've admired are passing on.  It makes me sit up and take note of my own mortality and wonder how much time I have to accomplish those things I feel I must?  I need more time!

So, I grabbed a book from my library this morning, looking for some inspiration and noticed a page I'd bookmarked on another day that I can't remember.  Wouldn't you know it is about time and death?  (Expect a miracle and don't discount it!)  I opened to Ovid's poem Metamorphoses: XV where he is talking of the teachings of Pythagoras:

"O mortals,
Dumb in cold fear of death, why do you tremble
At Stygian rivers, shadows, empty name,
The lying stock of poets, and the terrors
Of a false world? I tell you that your bodies
Can never suffer evil, whether fire
Consumes them, or the waste of time.  Our souls
Are deathless; always, when they leave our bodies."

 He goes on to say:

"All things are always changing,
But nothing dies. The spirit comes and goes,
...but always it keeps on living."

"Full sail, I voyage
Over the boundless ocean, and I tell you
Nothing is permanent in all the world.
All things are fluent; every image forms,
Wandering through change. Time is itself a river
In constant movement, and the hours flow by
Like water, wave on wave, pursued, pursuing
Forever fugitive, forever new.
That which has been, is not; that which was not,
Begins to be; motion and moment always
In process of renewal."

Did I mention this was written in 6 BC?  It is an amazing poem and the book I picked up was "The Norton Anthology of World Masterpieces"  and I have had it since my college days and have referred to it now and again over the years. (English Literature class at San Diego City College)

So, the soul lives on and time is an illusion.  Nothing new under the sun is there?

We had a nice storm blow through last night and today, my landscaper came and we did some cleaning up and everything looks good again.  All the trees shook off their dead limbs and no one was hurt so it's all good!  I sat in my car for a while this morning after taking a ride down Buford Dam Road which is really pretty ride through lots of green trees and I felt refreshed and rejuvenated when I got back so I just sat there, watching the trees dance as the wind blew through them. 

Sunday, the beginning of a new.  The end of the old.  Time flows on and today, I expected a miracle and I was not disappointed.  Today was awesome and the best is yet to come.  And so it is!

Expect a miracle, my friends.  You won't be disappointed.

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

September 23, 2015 - Expect a Miracle and hello, again!

September 23, 2015

A couple of years down the road since my last post and I have yet to go back and read earlier posts but I will.

Life changes, seconds turn into minutes, minutes to hours and now a couple of years have passed in what seems the blink of an eye.  It almost makes me want to do a post on Quantum Physics but no, when I start blogging I seem to be operating on so many levels at once, all crying for a voice, so I have to focus. Focus on the message of today and what I want to share.

Hope and belief are my focus for the next few minutes.  I want to share my hope.  Hope that today is going to be an awesome day.  Belief that I have the power to make it so.  I expect a miracle in my life every single day and if I slow down, think about it, review at the end of the day, I can find those miracles.  Sometimes, as they occur, I remember to say "Thank you, God, Goddess, All There Is!"

Dr. Wayne Dyer has transitioned.  My Reid has transitioned.  Other friends and family are transitioning at an accelerated rate as I grow older.  Life is changing, as it always is and it's good.  Those people will be missed but they are also a huge part of who I AM.  Dr. Dyer used to talk about I AM.  I AM so much more than me but I AM.  Got to love it!  :-)

Time to move into my day.  More blogs to come.  I'm starting a Writer's Group and tomorrow night is our first meeting.  It's called "Wine, Women and Writing" and it's not that men are not invited, it's just there aren't any out there who want to come to a Writer's Group in Buford, Georgia so it's all women, which is okay.  We will support, motivate and help each other which, after all, is a big part of what LIFE is about, isn't it?

Look for your miracles today.  Tiny or Large.  What touches your heart, your soul, your spirit?  Open yourself to the Divine and allow goodness and love to permeate your being.

It is a great day to be alive, life has been good, and the BEST is yet to come.  EXPECT A MIRACLE and you'll get one.  And so it is!

Friday, February 15, 2013

Short and Sweet

I am astounded by the number of comments I've been receiving and promise to get back to writing (thinking on paper) soon.  Since I started back to work, there hasn't been much time and most of my meandering is done in my journal.  However, I guess there are others like me and if I say one thing that makes another person think more positively or feel better about their own Self then I guess the miracle has already occurred.

Walking to my gate yesterday, I noticed three brilliant wild Iris poking up, beckoning to me and I thanked God for the miracle of beautiful Iris in the dead of winter.  I love when 3 comes into my consciousness but that's a discussion for another day when I have more time.

For now, Expect a Miracle...and don't discount it when you receive it! 

Love & Light...Sabra

Friday, February 3, 2012

Fabulous Friday

Creativity Workshops started on Wednesday and will run for the next 6-8 weeks, depending on how far we get and how quickly we get there. It is time for further self-exploration and I am starting anew the journey of a thousand steps.

I've been trying to "push" time the past few weeks and it's not working. No matter how hard I try to pretend there may be 80 seconds in a minute, I am constantly reminded there are only 60. So, yes...I've been "running late." I'm working on it as I want to be punctual as much as the next person but something about me wants to "push" time. Wonder why?

Nothing is coming this I blocked...seem to be. Does that ever happen to you? Nothing to do but jump in the shower and get on with the day, trying to see the beauty in every moment. I have to remind myself that there is beauty in every moment if I only take the time to look. Simple things are sometimes the hardest to accomplish.

So...CARPE DIEM! Look for the beauty, arrive on time, expect a miracle! Got it! Go get 'em!