Didn't sleep well last night and not feeling well today. Could it have anything to do with the Little Caesar's pizza and hot wings I ate last night? That and the fact that I'm "beyond tired" from all of the fun and festivities surrounding "the wedding" and am in need of some down time. Perhaps all of the above combined?
Walked the yard this morning and am excited to see what's going to bloom next. I have a lot of Lilies and Iris' with buds that are blooming this year for the first time so it is like waiting for Christmas to see what I'm going to get from these plants. I have some blue Bearded Iris blooming and some regular Iris in multi-colors. It's always colorful in my yard and it starts with the Crocus, Forsythia and Daffodils. Next come the Hyacinths, then the Tulips and the Lilies and Iris'. I also have border Lilies that bloom later and the Lilies of the Valley are blooming now...on and on...all and each so very precious and they seem like a gift from God to me personally! Japanese water lilies, calla lilies, stargazer lilies, azaleas, hydrangeas, sage, bee balm, lavendar, hostas, ...and on and on. Sounds like I have a huge yard, doesn't it? I don't. Every space is planted though and it's a sight to see, for sure. Oh, did I mention the large purple Clematis, Lilac, gerber daisies, ...and on and on! Yes...it IS a sight to see. And...along with all of it come the WEEDS...so many WEEDS! I need to get out there in the next few days and pull some as they are crowding in with my little beauties.
Today is my painting group but I'm not going because I don't feel up to it. Friday and Saturday are the days of the Plein Air festival and I need to get my energy up for that as I'm painting on Main Street and want only good to flow from soul to the canvas. Maybe I'll even sell one or two, which would be most welcome!
Okay...much to do today so let me get off the computer. Jen and Elliot moved into their new home last night. Poor Ian was having a hard time trying to figure it all out. I'm wondering if they actually put him in his bed last night or if he slept with them. I'll go with "slept with them!"
Within two weeks there has been a shower, a bachelor/bachelorette party, a wedding rehearsal, a wedding, a house closing AND a move. (Not to mention the out-of-town guests we so enjoyed.)WOW! It's enough to make my head spin. It's all good though and life waits for no one...just jump on that horse and ride it for all it's worth.
As for me, I'm having a cup of peppermint tea and going back to bed. No more Little Caesar's pizza/wings for me. Bring on the raw veggies.
Wishing you a joyful day.
Namaste!
Showing posts with label wedding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wedding. Show all posts
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
Celebration of Love
Monday morning and I'm glad for the new week. We've all been so wrapped up in wedding preparations and now it's over and the families are all going back to their respective lives and reality is seeping back in and life is settling down and we're on to the next thing.
The "wedding in a meadow" was a beautiful event. The kids were married under a rustic arbor that Elliot and Arlo had made just for the day and it touched my heart in so many ways. It was a beautiful wedding and pretty much what THEY wanted, from invitations to reception. I felt a little left out of the planning process and lost in the middle of it all because I wasn't the one "in charge" and no one seemed to be "in charge" and everyone was wary of stepping on anyone else's toes (a result of "blended families" I suppose) and it felt, for me, out of control but I did the best I knew to do and if I offended someone with what I did or didn't do, oh well...it was never intentional. The most important thing, in my opinion, is that the KIDS were happy with EVERYTHING and so from that perspective, it was a tremendous and wonderful SUCCESS. It certainly was a touching ceremony even if I didn't expect or understand the "readings" which are, I am assuming, an "Episcopal" part of the service and it was a lovely addition to have even more family involved. God certainly shined on those two because the day could not have been any more glorious, full of sunshine and warmth. It was about as perfect a Spring day as one could imagine. (I lifted them up to God/Goddess/All There Is, in my own way when I bowed my head.) The sun was shining brightly, there were sounds of moving water in the background (from a bubbling brook) and birds sang from trees under a cloudless sky. It was glorious.
It seems odd to think of my daughter being a part of another family now. I went to the home of her new family the morning after the wedding to offer help to clean up since they had hosted the reception (since the kids were married on their property) and most everything had already been cleaned up but I did what I could do or was asked. For some reason, it felt a little "frosty" and I am not understanding why but can't worry about it so I am just letting it go (I guess I felt "judged" and I don't know why so that was a bit uncomfortable for me. It was like I'd done something wrong but I don't know what I did, if you know what I mean.). My grandson, Ian, was there, sleeping and it felt odd not to see him or hold him and to step back and let them have "their" time with him. They don't get to enjoy him as often I do so it was the right thing to do.
The rehearsal was interesting because Jenny and Jessica got lost on the way up and they arrived in the meadow an hour and a half after the rehearsal was supposed to begin...but we got through the rehearsal just fine and then got to the rehearsal dinner where Elliot's Mother had prepared a nice Greek meal. Afterwards, my WHOLE family went back to the hotel and it felt so good to know that ALL of my children were under one roof, as well as their Dad. That doesn't happen too often! My room had two queen beds so I had my 3 grandsons and 2 granddaugther's spend the night in my room and it was cozy and comforting to have all of them in my room, if a bit crowded. They didn't seem to mind and I sure enjoyed seeing all of them as they slept so peacefully!
My brother and sister totally missed the wedding ceremony and arrived just as it was all over and everyone had headed up to the house for the reception. Fortunately, Jenny was still in the meadow talking to friends so my brother, Jack, gave her a ride up to the house on his Harley. We've got the pictures to share! I felt badly for my brother because he spent a lot of time, effort and money to be at her wedding and he was distressed to have been late (that's another story...you'd have to know my sister to understand). My sister (who was traveling in a car behind my brother and his wife who were on the motorcycle) had made the jewelry that Jen was to wear in the wedding (and it obviously didn't make it in time). As it was, Jen had to borrow jewelry from Elliot's stepmother to wear (which didn't make me happy) but Jenny was, as she is about almost everything, cool with it. She put it on when Mechelle got there and was happy enough. Poor Mechelle was as distraught as my brother but it is what it is and they missed it so we'll show them the pictures and at least they made the reception and got to see the toast, cake-cutting, etc.
Part of the reason Jenny and Jess were late getting to the rehearsal is that they went to pick up the cakes. Well, unfortunately, the wedding cake somehow fell over in the box (going up the mountain roads, I guess) so it looked like a leaning tower of Pisa when it came out of the box. Jen and Elliot took it all in stride and it still tasted wonderful. It was a 3-layer cake, very simple with their initials and a curl of fresh daisy's as decoration. Elliot's cake was a drum (because he is a drummer, of course) and it was equally delicious and fortunately, suffered no damage. Oh, and the cake knives were left in the box at the hotel so we had to use one of Elliot's Mom's knives for them to cut the cake. At least Elliot remembered the "bridge and groom" glasses when we did the champagne toast. We were getting ready to do the toast and Elliot looked at Jenny and said "where are our glasses?" and then she remembered and Jess went to get them! As I said, NO ONE was in CONTROL of anything but EVERYTHING worked out just fine! Elliot's brother offered up a touching, heart felt toast and then we put Jessica (Jen's sister) on the spot and she offered up a very sweet toast. It was lovely.
I saw my old boyfriend (who I had hoped to never have to see again) and it was okay to see him and I had a nice wall that will never be let down again so it didn't hurt to see him. I was happy he was able to be there to see Jen married as it was always my dream that he would be a part of it so I guess it was a dream come true although not exactly as I had once envisioned it. There was still that little place within me that was holding the hand of her own first love...I guess that's okay...still I was sitting next to the man who was the REAL partner in my life and who I love dearly still).
The best part of everything, for me, was having my son, his wife and two children, my older daughter, her husband and three children, my ex-husband (and friend) and Jenny all TOGETHER in one place and I hugged and kissed them all as much as I possibly could! I also especially loved seeing Jen's grandmother and her half-brother and yes, it was nice to see Reid, too. That was as exciting to me as the actual wedding ceremony (which was much too traditional for my taste but it wasn't my ceremony...but THEIRS and that's what they wanted).
Jen and Elliot were already a couple in my mind as they have a child, just bought a home and have a promise to each other and a life together. The ceremony cemented it FOR THEM and ON PAPER FOR POSTERITY. Elliot was brought up "in the church" so this was all very important to him and his family who are still active in their church. Jen's great-grandfather was a Presbyterian minister and her Grandmother rarely misses a Sunday at the church she has attended for years. I guess the "church" is more-or-less in her blood. I'm sure they will incorporate the church as a part of their lives and Ian's (who was baptised (?) or is it christened (?) in the Episcopal church the Saturday before Easter. I didn't attend but not for any reason other than I was tired because I had a shower for Jenny the same day and the event for Ian was in the evening.).
I, personally, don't align myself with a particular church but with God/Goddess/All There Is (for God is neither male or female in my opinion...God is the "nameless") and don't feel the need for the church for support. However, that having been said, I do attend Church, on occasion, when Spirit moves me and it doesn't matter the denomination because I don't believe the teachings of any one particular church but I go to Church to celebrate God and because the church is a symbol of God's house. I love to take communion for the same reason. However, I feel as close to God when I am working in my garden or walking in nature or sitting in my chair, as I am now because GOD is always with me, no matter when I am, God is right here with me. So why do I need to go to a church to celebrate and worship God? I don't. I have been involved with different churches over the course of my (seemingly long) life and have been a "born-again Christian (Baptist Church when I was 24) witnessing on street corners and praying to bring souls to Jesus so they wouldn't go to hell. I've chanted Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo and recited portions of the Lotus Sutra to the fundamental Object of Worship called the Gohonzon when I was learning about and practicing Nichoren Shoshu Buddhism. I've stood, genuflecgted and sat in Catholic churches including the Basilica in Washington, DC (where I took communion even though I "wasn't Catholic"...I told my good Catholic friend that I didn't think God would mind...as I lined up for the wafer and wine) and Catholic churches all over South America (thanks, Kris) and I took my confirmation at 12 years old in the Destin Presbyterian Church. I've read my St. James version of the Bible (which was a gift on my 24th birthday from B.J. Stevens) several times, especially the New Testament. I've read The Bhagavad-Gita, The Tibetan Book of the Dead, The Essential Kabbalah, the Tao Te Ching, studied Joseph Campbell's and Carl Jung's beliefs and on and on...so MANY different views and ways to reach enlightenment and grow spiritually and yet it all comes right back to me...sitting here in this chair as I write...with GOD in me...a part of me. And that GOD within is celebrating the love my daughter feels for her new husband and for her child and her family. It is the LOVE that is the most important part of ALL...for GOD IS LOVE and what more is there? May their love deepen and grow throughout the days of their lives and may they raise their child(ren) in the way that seems most appropriate to them, be it in the Episcopal Church or not and may they always listen to their HEARTS and the GOD WITHIN instead of basing their lives on a canon or what someone else tells them is truth for there are many truths. Okay, so I got off on a tangent there but organized religion makes me a little nervous, especially when one is told "this is the ONLY way..." However, I understand the purpose and the meaning behind organized religion and accept that it is "A" way and necessary for some. God speakes to each of us in a different way and the churches do a lot of GOOD in this world, too so that's a good thing.
Wow, writing this blog today has had me "all over the place." Bottom line...the wedding was beautiful, the kids are now a Mr. and Mrs., family and friends came together to witness, celebrate and share in love...it is ALL GOOD...God is good, my family is healthy, happy and all three of my children have WONDERFUL people as mates who love them dearly and whom they love equally and good lives before them with healthy, happy children. It's all a Mother could ask for her children.
So, to Jen and Elliot...I celebrate your LOVE and wish you joy, happiness ,togetherness, prosperity and health...all the days of your lives.
Wishing everyone a glorious, love-filled day!
Namaste!
The "wedding in a meadow" was a beautiful event. The kids were married under a rustic arbor that Elliot and Arlo had made just for the day and it touched my heart in so many ways. It was a beautiful wedding and pretty much what THEY wanted, from invitations to reception. I felt a little left out of the planning process and lost in the middle of it all because I wasn't the one "in charge" and no one seemed to be "in charge" and everyone was wary of stepping on anyone else's toes (a result of "blended families" I suppose) and it felt, for me, out of control but I did the best I knew to do and if I offended someone with what I did or didn't do, oh well...it was never intentional. The most important thing, in my opinion, is that the KIDS were happy with EVERYTHING and so from that perspective, it was a tremendous and wonderful SUCCESS. It certainly was a touching ceremony even if I didn't expect or understand the "readings" which are, I am assuming, an "Episcopal" part of the service and it was a lovely addition to have even more family involved. God certainly shined on those two because the day could not have been any more glorious, full of sunshine and warmth. It was about as perfect a Spring day as one could imagine. (I lifted them up to God/Goddess/All There Is, in my own way when I bowed my head.) The sun was shining brightly, there were sounds of moving water in the background (from a bubbling brook) and birds sang from trees under a cloudless sky. It was glorious.
It seems odd to think of my daughter being a part of another family now. I went to the home of her new family the morning after the wedding to offer help to clean up since they had hosted the reception (since the kids were married on their property) and most everything had already been cleaned up but I did what I could do or was asked. For some reason, it felt a little "frosty" and I am not understanding why but can't worry about it so I am just letting it go (I guess I felt "judged" and I don't know why so that was a bit uncomfortable for me. It was like I'd done something wrong but I don't know what I did, if you know what I mean.). My grandson, Ian, was there, sleeping and it felt odd not to see him or hold him and to step back and let them have "their" time with him. They don't get to enjoy him as often I do so it was the right thing to do.
The rehearsal was interesting because Jenny and Jessica got lost on the way up and they arrived in the meadow an hour and a half after the rehearsal was supposed to begin...but we got through the rehearsal just fine and then got to the rehearsal dinner where Elliot's Mother had prepared a nice Greek meal. Afterwards, my WHOLE family went back to the hotel and it felt so good to know that ALL of my children were under one roof, as well as their Dad. That doesn't happen too often! My room had two queen beds so I had my 3 grandsons and 2 granddaugther's spend the night in my room and it was cozy and comforting to have all of them in my room, if a bit crowded. They didn't seem to mind and I sure enjoyed seeing all of them as they slept so peacefully!
My brother and sister totally missed the wedding ceremony and arrived just as it was all over and everyone had headed up to the house for the reception. Fortunately, Jenny was still in the meadow talking to friends so my brother, Jack, gave her a ride up to the house on his Harley. We've got the pictures to share! I felt badly for my brother because he spent a lot of time, effort and money to be at her wedding and he was distressed to have been late (that's another story...you'd have to know my sister to understand). My sister (who was traveling in a car behind my brother and his wife who were on the motorcycle) had made the jewelry that Jen was to wear in the wedding (and it obviously didn't make it in time). As it was, Jen had to borrow jewelry from Elliot's stepmother to wear (which didn't make me happy) but Jenny was, as she is about almost everything, cool with it. She put it on when Mechelle got there and was happy enough. Poor Mechelle was as distraught as my brother but it is what it is and they missed it so we'll show them the pictures and at least they made the reception and got to see the toast, cake-cutting, etc.
Part of the reason Jenny and Jess were late getting to the rehearsal is that they went to pick up the cakes. Well, unfortunately, the wedding cake somehow fell over in the box (going up the mountain roads, I guess) so it looked like a leaning tower of Pisa when it came out of the box. Jen and Elliot took it all in stride and it still tasted wonderful. It was a 3-layer cake, very simple with their initials and a curl of fresh daisy's as decoration. Elliot's cake was a drum (because he is a drummer, of course) and it was equally delicious and fortunately, suffered no damage. Oh, and the cake knives were left in the box at the hotel so we had to use one of Elliot's Mom's knives for them to cut the cake. At least Elliot remembered the "bridge and groom" glasses when we did the champagne toast. We were getting ready to do the toast and Elliot looked at Jenny and said "where are our glasses?" and then she remembered and Jess went to get them! As I said, NO ONE was in CONTROL of anything but EVERYTHING worked out just fine! Elliot's brother offered up a touching, heart felt toast and then we put Jessica (Jen's sister) on the spot and she offered up a very sweet toast. It was lovely.
I saw my old boyfriend (who I had hoped to never have to see again) and it was okay to see him and I had a nice wall that will never be let down again so it didn't hurt to see him. I was happy he was able to be there to see Jen married as it was always my dream that he would be a part of it so I guess it was a dream come true although not exactly as I had once envisioned it. There was still that little place within me that was holding the hand of her own first love...I guess that's okay...still I was sitting next to the man who was the REAL partner in my life and who I love dearly still).
The best part of everything, for me, was having my son, his wife and two children, my older daughter, her husband and three children, my ex-husband (and friend) and Jenny all TOGETHER in one place and I hugged and kissed them all as much as I possibly could! I also especially loved seeing Jen's grandmother and her half-brother and yes, it was nice to see Reid, too. That was as exciting to me as the actual wedding ceremony (which was much too traditional for my taste but it wasn't my ceremony...but THEIRS and that's what they wanted).
Jen and Elliot were already a couple in my mind as they have a child, just bought a home and have a promise to each other and a life together. The ceremony cemented it FOR THEM and ON PAPER FOR POSTERITY. Elliot was brought up "in the church" so this was all very important to him and his family who are still active in their church. Jen's great-grandfather was a Presbyterian minister and her Grandmother rarely misses a Sunday at the church she has attended for years. I guess the "church" is more-or-less in her blood. I'm sure they will incorporate the church as a part of their lives and Ian's (who was baptised (?) or is it christened (?) in the Episcopal church the Saturday before Easter. I didn't attend but not for any reason other than I was tired because I had a shower for Jenny the same day and the event for Ian was in the evening.).
I, personally, don't align myself with a particular church but with God/Goddess/All There Is (for God is neither male or female in my opinion...God is the "nameless") and don't feel the need for the church for support. However, that having been said, I do attend Church, on occasion, when Spirit moves me and it doesn't matter the denomination because I don't believe the teachings of any one particular church but I go to Church to celebrate God and because the church is a symbol of God's house. I love to take communion for the same reason. However, I feel as close to God when I am working in my garden or walking in nature or sitting in my chair, as I am now because GOD is always with me, no matter when I am, God is right here with me. So why do I need to go to a church to celebrate and worship God? I don't. I have been involved with different churches over the course of my (seemingly long) life and have been a "born-again Christian (Baptist Church when I was 24) witnessing on street corners and praying to bring souls to Jesus so they wouldn't go to hell. I've chanted Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo and recited portions of the Lotus Sutra to the fundamental Object of Worship called the Gohonzon when I was learning about and practicing Nichoren Shoshu Buddhism. I've stood, genuflecgted and sat in Catholic churches including the Basilica in Washington, DC (where I took communion even though I "wasn't Catholic"...I told my good Catholic friend that I didn't think God would mind...as I lined up for the wafer and wine) and Catholic churches all over South America (thanks, Kris) and I took my confirmation at 12 years old in the Destin Presbyterian Church. I've read my St. James version of the Bible (which was a gift on my 24th birthday from B.J. Stevens) several times, especially the New Testament. I've read The Bhagavad-Gita, The Tibetan Book of the Dead, The Essential Kabbalah, the Tao Te Ching, studied Joseph Campbell's and Carl Jung's beliefs and on and on...so MANY different views and ways to reach enlightenment and grow spiritually and yet it all comes right back to me...sitting here in this chair as I write...with GOD in me...a part of me. And that GOD within is celebrating the love my daughter feels for her new husband and for her child and her family. It is the LOVE that is the most important part of ALL...for GOD IS LOVE and what more is there? May their love deepen and grow throughout the days of their lives and may they raise their child(ren) in the way that seems most appropriate to them, be it in the Episcopal Church or not and may they always listen to their HEARTS and the GOD WITHIN instead of basing their lives on a canon or what someone else tells them is truth for there are many truths. Okay, so I got off on a tangent there but organized religion makes me a little nervous, especially when one is told "this is the ONLY way..." However, I understand the purpose and the meaning behind organized religion and accept that it is "A" way and necessary for some. God speakes to each of us in a different way and the churches do a lot of GOOD in this world, too so that's a good thing.
Wow, writing this blog today has had me "all over the place." Bottom line...the wedding was beautiful, the kids are now a Mr. and Mrs., family and friends came together to witness, celebrate and share in love...it is ALL GOOD...God is good, my family is healthy, happy and all three of my children have WONDERFUL people as mates who love them dearly and whom they love equally and good lives before them with healthy, happy children. It's all a Mother could ask for her children.
So, to Jen and Elliot...I celebrate your LOVE and wish you joy, happiness ,togetherness, prosperity and health...all the days of your lives.
Wishing everyone a glorious, love-filled day!
Namaste!
Thursday, April 16, 2009
I hit the wall running...
Yes...I was doing great until I hit the wall running and was stopped cold. I've been dusting myself off and trying to find my legs again. More on that later.
I succeeded with the fast for 3 days and then had a spinach quesadilla and hated myself for a week, maybe longer. Still beating myself up about it but I'll try again and maybe succeed for the full 10-days next time. I should NEVER have left the relative safety of my own space. I drove to my daughter's (26 miles) and it was 26 miles of unending restaurants of every kind and billboards of food of every kind. Earlier in the day, I had gone to my painting group and I skipped the lunch afterwards even though they were going to my FAVORITE Mexican restaurant. I came home and drank my lemonade like a good girl. Yet that Mexican food was floating around in my brain, taunting me and I had almost made it to my daughters house but at the last turn, there it was, like a beacon of light in the dark night...a brand new Mexican restaurant flashing NOW OPEN. My car turned of it's own violition and next thing I knew, I was sitting in a booth at a table with a multi-colored tablecloth in front of a basket of chips and a bowl of salsa and my mouth was saying "spinach quesadilla" please. Someone else within me (the "naughty" girl) just took over and the FASTer (the "good" girl) in me went someplace else. Such is my life. I try and I try and I try.
Today is Thursday and my son, his wife and my two grandchildren are arriving from Denver to be a part of the wedding. Tomorrow we all head north to Blue Ridge where we'll staying in one of the town's new hotels. It is a rare occasion because ALL of my children and grandchildren will be together in one place because of "THE WEDDING." I could write for an hour or two about THE WEDDING but I've much to do today around THE WEDDING so I'll keep it short. It will be a beautiful, outdoor wedding and I'll post pictures later. The wedding is coming AFTER the baby carriage but what else is new these days? He'll be in the wedding instead of the gleam in his Dad's eye at the wedding! :-)
For me, the ONLY dark spot in all of this and it may yet turn out to be a silver lining is having to see someone I could live the rest of my life and be completely happy never to see again. Yet see them I must and I will and then it will be a memory and I will hopefully never have to see them again. I started to say there are not many people in my life I don't wish to see again but the truth is that there is only ONE person in my life I have a desire to never see again and it is the person I'll come face-to-face with on Friday night at the Rehearsal Dinner. There's no getting around it and believe me, I've tried and tried to think of a way to avoid seeing them but it's not happening. So, this is my greatest challenge, my "opportunity for growth", my worst nightmare...whatever...we'll see. It's got my stomach in an uproar, I can tell you, and it's making me sweat when I think about it. I "pep talk" myself with the old "there is nothing to fear but fear itself" and "what's the worst thing that could happen" and then "what's the best thing that could happen?" Yet, I come up with a complete and total blank and I can't answer even one of those questions. I'm the answers lady and I can't find an answer for my own dilemma. I can't pep talk my own self to the other side of this one and it is making me me crazy. So, what to do? What to do?
I'm going to put it out of my mind for now. I've got a lot to do today so I'm going to make my list and stay focused on what I need to do and not let this "other" pull me off focus. It's like walking headfirst into a wind tunnel....I'll just keep my head tucked down and keep moving my feet, one step at a time and I'll get to the end of this tunnel and walk out into a beautiful day of sunshine, brightly colored flowers and birds singing. I am focusing on watching my grandchildren on Saturday, scattering rose petals, doing cute grandchildren things that make us all smile...watching my daughter in her beautiful dress walk down the aisle towards her handsome fiancee and her future...oh geez, I'm getting the lump in my throat and misty eyes just thinking about it. I'm not going to let the "other" get my day...it's a beautiful, sacred moment and I am going to float into that moment and just enjoy the moment of LOVE and FAMILY and let the "other" take care of itself in the way that is best for all concerned. If it weren't for that "other" NONE of this would be happening and life would be so different so I will focus on that and be grateful. Yes, that's what I'm going to do. I'm sure it's going to be fine. I have so much to be grateful for and that's where I choose to put my focus.
Now...up and at 'em! There's a wedding happening in two days and my beautiful little Sabra and Timothy are probably at the airport in Denver already getting on the plane with their Mommy and Daddy to come and visit and have some fun with the family! It's all good!
I'll write more AFTER the wedding. I'm leaving my computer at home for the next few days and won't even be checking (gasp) e-mail until Monday morning. So, have a great weekend and I'll let you know how it all goes (even the "other" experience).
Namaste!
I succeeded with the fast for 3 days and then had a spinach quesadilla and hated myself for a week, maybe longer. Still beating myself up about it but I'll try again and maybe succeed for the full 10-days next time. I should NEVER have left the relative safety of my own space. I drove to my daughter's (26 miles) and it was 26 miles of unending restaurants of every kind and billboards of food of every kind. Earlier in the day, I had gone to my painting group and I skipped the lunch afterwards even though they were going to my FAVORITE Mexican restaurant. I came home and drank my lemonade like a good girl. Yet that Mexican food was floating around in my brain, taunting me and I had almost made it to my daughters house but at the last turn, there it was, like a beacon of light in the dark night...a brand new Mexican restaurant flashing NOW OPEN. My car turned of it's own violition and next thing I knew, I was sitting in a booth at a table with a multi-colored tablecloth in front of a basket of chips and a bowl of salsa and my mouth was saying "spinach quesadilla" please. Someone else within me (the "naughty" girl) just took over and the FASTer (the "good" girl) in me went someplace else. Such is my life. I try and I try and I try.
Today is Thursday and my son, his wife and my two grandchildren are arriving from Denver to be a part of the wedding. Tomorrow we all head north to Blue Ridge where we'll staying in one of the town's new hotels. It is a rare occasion because ALL of my children and grandchildren will be together in one place because of "THE WEDDING." I could write for an hour or two about THE WEDDING but I've much to do today around THE WEDDING so I'll keep it short. It will be a beautiful, outdoor wedding and I'll post pictures later. The wedding is coming AFTER the baby carriage but what else is new these days? He'll be in the wedding instead of the gleam in his Dad's eye at the wedding! :-)
For me, the ONLY dark spot in all of this and it may yet turn out to be a silver lining is having to see someone I could live the rest of my life and be completely happy never to see again. Yet see them I must and I will and then it will be a memory and I will hopefully never have to see them again. I started to say there are not many people in my life I don't wish to see again but the truth is that there is only ONE person in my life I have a desire to never see again and it is the person I'll come face-to-face with on Friday night at the Rehearsal Dinner. There's no getting around it and believe me, I've tried and tried to think of a way to avoid seeing them but it's not happening. So, this is my greatest challenge, my "opportunity for growth", my worst nightmare...whatever...we'll see. It's got my stomach in an uproar, I can tell you, and it's making me sweat when I think about it. I "pep talk" myself with the old "there is nothing to fear but fear itself" and "what's the worst thing that could happen" and then "what's the best thing that could happen?" Yet, I come up with a complete and total blank and I can't answer even one of those questions. I'm the answers lady and I can't find an answer for my own dilemma. I can't pep talk my own self to the other side of this one and it is making me me crazy. So, what to do? What to do?
I'm going to put it out of my mind for now. I've got a lot to do today so I'm going to make my list and stay focused on what I need to do and not let this "other" pull me off focus. It's like walking headfirst into a wind tunnel....I'll just keep my head tucked down and keep moving my feet, one step at a time and I'll get to the end of this tunnel and walk out into a beautiful day of sunshine, brightly colored flowers and birds singing. I am focusing on watching my grandchildren on Saturday, scattering rose petals, doing cute grandchildren things that make us all smile...watching my daughter in her beautiful dress walk down the aisle towards her handsome fiancee and her future...oh geez, I'm getting the lump in my throat and misty eyes just thinking about it. I'm not going to let the "other" get my day...it's a beautiful, sacred moment and I am going to float into that moment and just enjoy the moment of LOVE and FAMILY and let the "other" take care of itself in the way that is best for all concerned. If it weren't for that "other" NONE of this would be happening and life would be so different so I will focus on that and be grateful. Yes, that's what I'm going to do. I'm sure it's going to be fine. I have so much to be grateful for and that's where I choose to put my focus.
Now...up and at 'em! There's a wedding happening in two days and my beautiful little Sabra and Timothy are probably at the airport in Denver already getting on the plane with their Mommy and Daddy to come and visit and have some fun with the family! It's all good!
I'll write more AFTER the wedding. I'm leaving my computer at home for the next few days and won't even be checking (gasp) e-mail until Monday morning. So, have a great weekend and I'll let you know how it all goes (even the "other" experience).
Namaste!
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Master Cleanse - Day 3 - Morning
Happy April 1st! April's showers bring May flowers and sure enough it's raining! Love it.
I woke up around 5:00am and did my "salt water flush" and then started on my morning meditations and learned exactly what I need as I go through my day today. Once that salt water flush started kicking in it was up and down so I've already had some exercise this morning. If you do this flush, be aware that you really need (1)to be close to a bathroom, very close and (2)buy extra soft tissue because you'll be using a lot of it. Those are two important facts that Stanley Burroughs forgot to mention in his book!
In about 15 minutes I leave to go paint with the ladies and I'm really looking forward to it. I'm definitely taking my easel today after my little back experience last week. I'm working with red, orange and yellow today. That's "hold on to my hat" painting although I don't have to wear a hat today because my hair looks and feels great! The painting is dying to get out of me and I keep seeing it in my head so I know exactly what it wants to be so I need to just let it flow out onto the canvas.
Wedding update: I've got some invitations out for the Bridal Shower which is after the christening on Saturday the 11st. I'm going to Loganville tonight to meet with the kids (since they didn't come here last night as I had hoped) so I can tie them down on some details and I can feel it's "all in order." It's just an illusion anyhow...order, that is but from all of the craziness will come a beautiful event. Staying in touch with the in-laws via e-mail and hoping for a beautiful experience for all involved!
Off and running now. It IS a great day to be alive, all is well in my world and I am expecting a miracle today. Sending love and light to YOU and a reminder to be on the lookout for your own miracles!
Much love...
Namaste!
I woke up around 5:00am and did my "salt water flush" and then started on my morning meditations and learned exactly what I need as I go through my day today. Once that salt water flush started kicking in it was up and down so I've already had some exercise this morning. If you do this flush, be aware that you really need (1)to be close to a bathroom, very close and (2)buy extra soft tissue because you'll be using a lot of it. Those are two important facts that Stanley Burroughs forgot to mention in his book!
In about 15 minutes I leave to go paint with the ladies and I'm really looking forward to it. I'm definitely taking my easel today after my little back experience last week. I'm working with red, orange and yellow today. That's "hold on to my hat" painting although I don't have to wear a hat today because my hair looks and feels great! The painting is dying to get out of me and I keep seeing it in my head so I know exactly what it wants to be so I need to just let it flow out onto the canvas.
Wedding update: I've got some invitations out for the Bridal Shower which is after the christening on Saturday the 11st. I'm going to Loganville tonight to meet with the kids (since they didn't come here last night as I had hoped) so I can tie them down on some details and I can feel it's "all in order." It's just an illusion anyhow...order, that is but from all of the craziness will come a beautiful event. Staying in touch with the in-laws via e-mail and hoping for a beautiful experience for all involved!
Off and running now. It IS a great day to be alive, all is well in my world and I am expecting a miracle today. Sending love and light to YOU and a reminder to be on the lookout for your own miracles!
Much love...
Namaste!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Painting with the Ladies
I made it to the group painting session at Anita's ArtsCool today and it was a total blast. I enjoyed meeting the other artists and watching their process as I was going through mine. Just getting out the door was an adventure and I went through the house like a mad woman getting my stuff together, leaving drawers open and items out that should have been put away but I was in a tear to leave and I had worked until past the "very last" moment before leaving. I always seem to believe a minute has more than 60 seconds or that an hour is longer than it really is because I am always "just a minute or two" late for EVERYTHING. Story of my life.
I got up at 5:00am and started my morning meditations and then my brother called so I talked to him for a while. Back to my morning meditations and when I finished around 8:00am, I came in and started working on my flyers again. I had made two, one for the Artist's Way workshop and another for the other three workshops I am planning. After doing some printing, I decided it would be more cost effective to put all of the workshops on one page instead of two so now it has to be redesigned again. I haven't done that yet. What I spent my time on, for the most part, was a redesign of the order form. I finished that up around 9:50am knowing it would only take me 5 minutes to get to Anita's ArtsCool from my house.
I started getting my stuff together. Pulled a painted canvas out from under the futon to overpaint since I don't have a blank one available. Then, into my drawers for the paints to take with me. I had to completely pull out the bottom drawer of the cabinet I keep my paints in because it's under my work table. I left that drawer laying out on the floor next to my work table. Next, which brushes should I take? Where to put it all? In a grocery bag...nah, too amateurish. Dug through the closet to find my trusty, roomy old black leather briefcase from my consulting days and was happy to find everything fit nicely. It was under a stack of other things that are now laying outside my closet door in a heap. Oh my gosh, forgot that I was planning on coloring my hair this morning while doing my morning meditations (trying to be a multi-tasker just didn't seem to work for me this morning) so I started looking for an appropriate hat to cover my sad-looking hair. On the top shelf of the bookcase I keep in my closet for extra folded clothes is where all my hats are located and wouldn't you know it...the one I wanted was on the bottom of all the other hats so there's also a pile of hats on the floor outside my closet. My room is now a collection of "piles" of "stuff" that needs to be put away.
By now, Wizzie knows something is going on and he's following me around like the puppy dog he is because he's wanting to take a walk but it's raining so I take him out to the front porch and put him on his tether to let him stay outside while I'm gone. He has water and a bed there and he'll be dry and comfortable and can go off the porch to relieve himself if needs to instead of peeing in my house because I was too busy to take him out for a walk as I should have and I wasn't looking forward to piles of stuff AND a wet mess to clean up when I got back home.
Next, I go looking for my IPOD as I love painting to music and find it where it should be, wonder of wonders and threw it in my bag. Then, I grab my stuff and out the door I go and I'm only 10 minutes late. By the time I got there, I was frazzled and 15 minutes late but no one had even started painting yet which was a good thing. Before I got out of the car, I took a moment to go into total relaxation and breathed deeply five times before opening the door and walking in with a big smile on my face and my black cap on my head so no one could see my hair with grey roots showing prominently, canvas under my arm and "professional-looking" briefcase in my other hand filled with paints, brushes, etc. I probably looked like it was something I did every day! No one knew I'd left a trail of destruction in my path just to get there.
Anita introduced me to all of the ladies, who were very friendly and then I found my spot and laid out some newspaper and put down my canvas on a flat surface. I pulled out my IPOD, strapped it on my arm and pressed MENU and nothing happened. So, the battery is dead which means NO MUSIC as usual and I had a brief moment of panic because it is the music infusing my soul that allows the connection between the "oneness" and my canvas. Oh well, I take that as a sign that I wasn't MEANT to listen to my IPOD so that leaves me the opportunity to communicate more with others as I paint. I believe it was Divine intervention that I not cut myself off from everyone else and pull from their energy instead and it worked out beautifullly. Thank you, God!
I SHOULD have used an easel because two hours of bending over the table to paint created a little problem for me that I felt AFTER I left at 1:30pm. I had so much fun there and did a couple more moments of deep breathing and closed my eyes and started letting the energy of the room, the people and the moment seep into my soul so I could create. There was nice background music playing which was a joy to me since my IPOD was dead. Now, all of the artists got busy. Some were using watercolors, some acrylics (like me), some were using oils and one lady was doing a painting on silk. It was a very interesting process and I could easily tell how beautiful it will be when finished.
The painting session was supposed to last from 10:00am-12:00pm but we painted until around 12:30pm and I think I was one of the first to start my cleaning up process so the time is flexible from what I can tell. Afterwards, there was a delightful critique session. One of the local artists who has a rather large following came to oversee the critique and she was set up in a director's chair directly in from of a large easel. We'd all put our work on one of the tables if we wanted a critique and another artist acted as facilitator and put each piece of art on the easel, one at a time in front of the "Director Artist" and then she offered her critique first before the floor was opened to anyone else who may have some suggestions regarding the piece on the easel. By now, there were about 15 artists in the room, all women. Lots of Yin energy in the room and it was lovely.
The critique portion lasted for about an hour and it was very exciting to me to be a part of it all. My painting was well received and it made me feel good to hear other artists say nice things about it and I received one very good suggestion which I will incorporate into my painting next week when I go again. I wasn't too emotionally attached to it and was open to any comments from anyone there as they all certainly know a lot more than I do about this process. I just PAINT for the love of being in "color" and "energy" and I was proud that a fairly good piece came out this morning in such a small amount of time.
I enjoyed myself immensely and was happy I finally got around to going to the sessions. Anita invited me months ago and today is the first day I went and I will go again and often. I look forward to getting to know the ladies better as time goes on and my finances permit me to participate. It was one of those times I couldn't think of anything I would want to be doing more. I want to manifest more opportunities like this for myself and believe the "Universe will provide." If I never went again, I would have such a wonderful memory tucked away inside of that I can pull on that now when I need a "happy thought." (I actually have a very large cache of these type of thoughts!) This was a very talented group of women and I was just happy to be there with them, creating right along with those who were so much better and much more experienced artists than me. I learned that everyone is a little insecure about their work and how it will be received, not just ME! It was an "eureka" moment, for sure.
Afterwards, the artists usually go to lunch together but I didn't want to participate today as I was feeling a bit unsettled about how I'd left everything at home. I stopped at the new Dillard's Bar-b-que and got a rib sandwich to bring home (thank you, Sister!) and eat in peaceful silence. As soon as I walked in I let my Wizzie into the house and he was so happy to see me that it warmed my heart. I swear I love that dog of mine as much as I love any other member of my family and he ALWAYS loves me no matter what I do (like not taking the time to give him a proper walk this morning). I often joke and say that if I knew "then" what I know "now" about having a pet, I'd have gotten a dog instead of getting married! Maybe it's not really a joke? Ah, but then I wouldn't have gotten the three wonderful children and six grandchildren that make my life full and rich.
I sat down at the table and ate my sandwich, giving Wiz the two rib bones which he enjoyed unabashedly. I was happy to share with him. As I was sitting there eating, I felt the stab of pain in my back and thought, uh-oh. Now I'm paying for bending over the table for over two hours while I was painting. Instead of cleaning up the piles and messes I left in my wake this morning, I took two Advil, turned my electric blanket to high, stripped down and crawled into bed thinking I'd have a little nap before tidying up my house. Just as I dozed off the phone rang. It was my daughter Jenny calling to schedule time for next week to talk about her wedding WHICH IS IN THREE WEEKS. I took that call and turned over to snuggle back down and just as I dozed off the phone rang again. It was my daughter-in-law in Denver calling to talk about the plans for the wedding WHICH IS IN THREE WEEKS. Plan? Hell, I don't know. I'm so out of the loop on the planning of this wedding it's like I'm hardly a part of it. That changes NOW! I hung up the phone from her and turned over to go to sleep but my mind was in gear thinking of what I need to do around the wedding.
I've scheduled the time with Jenny and Elliot for Tuesday night. We'll talk about menu's and decorations and logistics. I scheduled time to drive up to the mountains on Saturday to Elliot's Dad's place (a 2-hour drive) so I can see the "lay of the land" and talk to his folks about the "plan." they are getting married on his property which is called "the Briar Patch" and is a beautiful piece of land in the North Georgia mountains between Blue Ridge and Blairsville. We've got to have a "plan" and since I work best under pressure I know that by the end of the evening on Tuesday night, THE PLAN will be in place. I am not going to let myself get crazy around this as I want to enjoy and savor every moment of it as it's the last wedding I'll get to be a part of as a MOM. I still can't believe my baby is getting married nor has it sunk in that she's no longer my baby. My other two children I can relate to as adults but not my baby. I wanted to keep her under my wing for far longer than she was willing. Is it that way for all Mother's?
With my job situation being what it (or isn't) I haven't been able to participate in this wedding as much as I would have liked financially. I'll do what I can do which is help with THE PLAN. I'm grateful that her "other" family (and that's a story for another day) who has offered some financial assistance as it has really helped her make her wedding what she wants it to be. In the midst of all the wedding plans, they are also buying their first home together. What craziness all at once! Two of the most stressful things a person experiences in life and they are doing them both at the same time. Strong, young adults they are and I am impressed by them both. I guess that's one way to only have to be totally crazy once! Fortunately, Elliot's Dad is in a better position than Jen's parents (us) and he's helped them with the house. Her grandmother has helped her with a whopping gift that has helped in ways she doesn't even know and the beautiful dress has been paid for by "the other" Dad! It's all going to work out fine and I'm sure it will be a touching, beautiful, loving event enjoyed and remembered fondly by all of us and THE PLAN will work beautifully.
So, with all of that having been said. I'm leaving the mess, the grey streak in my head and taking two more Advil and going back to bed (turning off the ringer on the phone, too) and see if I can't wake up feeling refreshed and pain free so I can use my evening to pick up behind the Sabra that was in a tear to get out this morning and have one of the most fun times of her life! It was worth it.
Tomorrow night, I'm going to a lecture at the Fox Theatre by Dr. Zahi Hawass, the Secretary General of the Supreme Council of Antiquities" in Egypt. The lecture is entitled "Mysteries of Tutankhamun Revealed" and promises to be a wonderful evening. I've seen Dr. Hawass on several PBS and Discovery Channel programs and I am delighted to have an opportunity to see him speak in person. The "Treasures of Tutankhamun" exhibit is at the Atlanta Civic Center now and I viewed it and bought my tickets to see Dr. Hawass on the same day. I was a little disappointed in the exhibit only because it wasn't as extensive as the exhibit I was fortunate enough to see about 20 years ago when it was in San Francisco. They were running tours 24 hours a day and my husband and I had tickets for a week night at 1:30am and we were happy to have gotten them. It was an amazing experience and the exhibit included a lot more artifacts and jewelry than the current one in Atlanta.
Originally, Dr. Hawass' lecture was scheduled for the Atlanta Civic Center but because he had an emergency out of the country, it was rescheduled for a week later and changed to the Fox Theatre which delighted me as I love going to the Fox. It's a marvelous relic of days gone past, and an Atlanta landmark. Being there reminds me of one of my first memories of being in Atlanta and realizing it was a whole new world of wonder, far from the fishing village I moved from with a one-room library and no cultural activities AT ALL unless you include charter boat fishing as a cultural activity. We moved to Atlanta when I was 15 and my class took a field trip there to see an Opera (in Italian, no less). At that time, I was just a little hick from a very small town in Florida and Atlanta was a BIG city and the FOX was a cultural experience that opened my eyes to a whole new world. The Fox theatre is a magical place, built in the pre-crash 1920's and it's ornate and gloriously fabulous. I highly recommend seeing it if you're in Atlanta.
Every day is an adventure and something new and wonderful seems to happen for me every day. It's a wonderful world in which we live and there is so much to do and see if we only take the time. It's easy to get wrapped up and bogged down in life's "little messes." but I choose to keep my options open. I know that when I do my morning meditations AS I SHOULD then I can expect a miracle in my day and most days, many more than one miracle will occur for me. I expect a miracle and I'm never disappointed. Ask me about my sister coming by and sharing her love with me this morning in a way that was totally unexpected and totally appreciated. It started my day of miracles. And...it's not over yet! God is good!
I hope you are having a good day and looking for your own miracles. I have no doubt they are there for you. I'm sending a bubble love and light to all. A special bubble goes out to Anita's friend Rosemary who had surgery this morning and I'm lifting her up for a speedy recovery.
It IS a great day to be alive and all is well in my world.
Namaste!
I got up at 5:00am and started my morning meditations and then my brother called so I talked to him for a while. Back to my morning meditations and when I finished around 8:00am, I came in and started working on my flyers again. I had made two, one for the Artist's Way workshop and another for the other three workshops I am planning. After doing some printing, I decided it would be more cost effective to put all of the workshops on one page instead of two so now it has to be redesigned again. I haven't done that yet. What I spent my time on, for the most part, was a redesign of the order form. I finished that up around 9:50am knowing it would only take me 5 minutes to get to Anita's ArtsCool from my house.
I started getting my stuff together. Pulled a painted canvas out from under the futon to overpaint since I don't have a blank one available. Then, into my drawers for the paints to take with me. I had to completely pull out the bottom drawer of the cabinet I keep my paints in because it's under my work table. I left that drawer laying out on the floor next to my work table. Next, which brushes should I take? Where to put it all? In a grocery bag...nah, too amateurish. Dug through the closet to find my trusty, roomy old black leather briefcase from my consulting days and was happy to find everything fit nicely. It was under a stack of other things that are now laying outside my closet door in a heap. Oh my gosh, forgot that I was planning on coloring my hair this morning while doing my morning meditations (trying to be a multi-tasker just didn't seem to work for me this morning) so I started looking for an appropriate hat to cover my sad-looking hair. On the top shelf of the bookcase I keep in my closet for extra folded clothes is where all my hats are located and wouldn't you know it...the one I wanted was on the bottom of all the other hats so there's also a pile of hats on the floor outside my closet. My room is now a collection of "piles" of "stuff" that needs to be put away.
By now, Wizzie knows something is going on and he's following me around like the puppy dog he is because he's wanting to take a walk but it's raining so I take him out to the front porch and put him on his tether to let him stay outside while I'm gone. He has water and a bed there and he'll be dry and comfortable and can go off the porch to relieve himself if needs to instead of peeing in my house because I was too busy to take him out for a walk as I should have and I wasn't looking forward to piles of stuff AND a wet mess to clean up when I got back home.
Next, I go looking for my IPOD as I love painting to music and find it where it should be, wonder of wonders and threw it in my bag. Then, I grab my stuff and out the door I go and I'm only 10 minutes late. By the time I got there, I was frazzled and 15 minutes late but no one had even started painting yet which was a good thing. Before I got out of the car, I took a moment to go into total relaxation and breathed deeply five times before opening the door and walking in with a big smile on my face and my black cap on my head so no one could see my hair with grey roots showing prominently, canvas under my arm and "professional-looking" briefcase in my other hand filled with paints, brushes, etc. I probably looked like it was something I did every day! No one knew I'd left a trail of destruction in my path just to get there.
Anita introduced me to all of the ladies, who were very friendly and then I found my spot and laid out some newspaper and put down my canvas on a flat surface. I pulled out my IPOD, strapped it on my arm and pressed MENU and nothing happened. So, the battery is dead which means NO MUSIC as usual and I had a brief moment of panic because it is the music infusing my soul that allows the connection between the "oneness" and my canvas. Oh well, I take that as a sign that I wasn't MEANT to listen to my IPOD so that leaves me the opportunity to communicate more with others as I paint. I believe it was Divine intervention that I not cut myself off from everyone else and pull from their energy instead and it worked out beautifullly. Thank you, God!
I SHOULD have used an easel because two hours of bending over the table to paint created a little problem for me that I felt AFTER I left at 1:30pm. I had so much fun there and did a couple more moments of deep breathing and closed my eyes and started letting the energy of the room, the people and the moment seep into my soul so I could create. There was nice background music playing which was a joy to me since my IPOD was dead. Now, all of the artists got busy. Some were using watercolors, some acrylics (like me), some were using oils and one lady was doing a painting on silk. It was a very interesting process and I could easily tell how beautiful it will be when finished.
The painting session was supposed to last from 10:00am-12:00pm but we painted until around 12:30pm and I think I was one of the first to start my cleaning up process so the time is flexible from what I can tell. Afterwards, there was a delightful critique session. One of the local artists who has a rather large following came to oversee the critique and she was set up in a director's chair directly in from of a large easel. We'd all put our work on one of the tables if we wanted a critique and another artist acted as facilitator and put each piece of art on the easel, one at a time in front of the "Director Artist" and then she offered her critique first before the floor was opened to anyone else who may have some suggestions regarding the piece on the easel. By now, there were about 15 artists in the room, all women. Lots of Yin energy in the room and it was lovely.
The critique portion lasted for about an hour and it was very exciting to me to be a part of it all. My painting was well received and it made me feel good to hear other artists say nice things about it and I received one very good suggestion which I will incorporate into my painting next week when I go again. I wasn't too emotionally attached to it and was open to any comments from anyone there as they all certainly know a lot more than I do about this process. I just PAINT for the love of being in "color" and "energy" and I was proud that a fairly good piece came out this morning in such a small amount of time.
I enjoyed myself immensely and was happy I finally got around to going to the sessions. Anita invited me months ago and today is the first day I went and I will go again and often. I look forward to getting to know the ladies better as time goes on and my finances permit me to participate. It was one of those times I couldn't think of anything I would want to be doing more. I want to manifest more opportunities like this for myself and believe the "Universe will provide." If I never went again, I would have such a wonderful memory tucked away inside of that I can pull on that now when I need a "happy thought." (I actually have a very large cache of these type of thoughts!) This was a very talented group of women and I was just happy to be there with them, creating right along with those who were so much better and much more experienced artists than me. I learned that everyone is a little insecure about their work and how it will be received, not just ME! It was an "eureka" moment, for sure.
Afterwards, the artists usually go to lunch together but I didn't want to participate today as I was feeling a bit unsettled about how I'd left everything at home. I stopped at the new Dillard's Bar-b-que and got a rib sandwich to bring home (thank you, Sister!) and eat in peaceful silence. As soon as I walked in I let my Wizzie into the house and he was so happy to see me that it warmed my heart. I swear I love that dog of mine as much as I love any other member of my family and he ALWAYS loves me no matter what I do (like not taking the time to give him a proper walk this morning). I often joke and say that if I knew "then" what I know "now" about having a pet, I'd have gotten a dog instead of getting married! Maybe it's not really a joke? Ah, but then I wouldn't have gotten the three wonderful children and six grandchildren that make my life full and rich.
I sat down at the table and ate my sandwich, giving Wiz the two rib bones which he enjoyed unabashedly. I was happy to share with him. As I was sitting there eating, I felt the stab of pain in my back and thought, uh-oh. Now I'm paying for bending over the table for over two hours while I was painting. Instead of cleaning up the piles and messes I left in my wake this morning, I took two Advil, turned my electric blanket to high, stripped down and crawled into bed thinking I'd have a little nap before tidying up my house. Just as I dozed off the phone rang. It was my daughter Jenny calling to schedule time for next week to talk about her wedding WHICH IS IN THREE WEEKS. I took that call and turned over to snuggle back down and just as I dozed off the phone rang again. It was my daughter-in-law in Denver calling to talk about the plans for the wedding WHICH IS IN THREE WEEKS. Plan? Hell, I don't know. I'm so out of the loop on the planning of this wedding it's like I'm hardly a part of it. That changes NOW! I hung up the phone from her and turned over to go to sleep but my mind was in gear thinking of what I need to do around the wedding.
I've scheduled the time with Jenny and Elliot for Tuesday night. We'll talk about menu's and decorations and logistics. I scheduled time to drive up to the mountains on Saturday to Elliot's Dad's place (a 2-hour drive) so I can see the "lay of the land" and talk to his folks about the "plan." they are getting married on his property which is called "the Briar Patch" and is a beautiful piece of land in the North Georgia mountains between Blue Ridge and Blairsville. We've got to have a "plan" and since I work best under pressure I know that by the end of the evening on Tuesday night, THE PLAN will be in place. I am not going to let myself get crazy around this as I want to enjoy and savor every moment of it as it's the last wedding I'll get to be a part of as a MOM. I still can't believe my baby is getting married nor has it sunk in that she's no longer my baby. My other two children I can relate to as adults but not my baby. I wanted to keep her under my wing for far longer than she was willing. Is it that way for all Mother's?
With my job situation being what it (or isn't) I haven't been able to participate in this wedding as much as I would have liked financially. I'll do what I can do which is help with THE PLAN. I'm grateful that her "other" family (and that's a story for another day) who has offered some financial assistance as it has really helped her make her wedding what she wants it to be. In the midst of all the wedding plans, they are also buying their first home together. What craziness all at once! Two of the most stressful things a person experiences in life and they are doing them both at the same time. Strong, young adults they are and I am impressed by them both. I guess that's one way to only have to be totally crazy once! Fortunately, Elliot's Dad is in a better position than Jen's parents (us) and he's helped them with the house. Her grandmother has helped her with a whopping gift that has helped in ways she doesn't even know and the beautiful dress has been paid for by "the other" Dad! It's all going to work out fine and I'm sure it will be a touching, beautiful, loving event enjoyed and remembered fondly by all of us and THE PLAN will work beautifully.
So, with all of that having been said. I'm leaving the mess, the grey streak in my head and taking two more Advil and going back to bed (turning off the ringer on the phone, too) and see if I can't wake up feeling refreshed and pain free so I can use my evening to pick up behind the Sabra that was in a tear to get out this morning and have one of the most fun times of her life! It was worth it.
Tomorrow night, I'm going to a lecture at the Fox Theatre by Dr. Zahi Hawass, the Secretary General of the Supreme Council of Antiquities" in Egypt. The lecture is entitled "Mysteries of Tutankhamun Revealed" and promises to be a wonderful evening. I've seen Dr. Hawass on several PBS and Discovery Channel programs and I am delighted to have an opportunity to see him speak in person. The "Treasures of Tutankhamun" exhibit is at the Atlanta Civic Center now and I viewed it and bought my tickets to see Dr. Hawass on the same day. I was a little disappointed in the exhibit only because it wasn't as extensive as the exhibit I was fortunate enough to see about 20 years ago when it was in San Francisco. They were running tours 24 hours a day and my husband and I had tickets for a week night at 1:30am and we were happy to have gotten them. It was an amazing experience and the exhibit included a lot more artifacts and jewelry than the current one in Atlanta.
Originally, Dr. Hawass' lecture was scheduled for the Atlanta Civic Center but because he had an emergency out of the country, it was rescheduled for a week later and changed to the Fox Theatre which delighted me as I love going to the Fox. It's a marvelous relic of days gone past, and an Atlanta landmark. Being there reminds me of one of my first memories of being in Atlanta and realizing it was a whole new world of wonder, far from the fishing village I moved from with a one-room library and no cultural activities AT ALL unless you include charter boat fishing as a cultural activity. We moved to Atlanta when I was 15 and my class took a field trip there to see an Opera (in Italian, no less). At that time, I was just a little hick from a very small town in Florida and Atlanta was a BIG city and the FOX was a cultural experience that opened my eyes to a whole new world. The Fox theatre is a magical place, built in the pre-crash 1920's and it's ornate and gloriously fabulous. I highly recommend seeing it if you're in Atlanta.
Every day is an adventure and something new and wonderful seems to happen for me every day. It's a wonderful world in which we live and there is so much to do and see if we only take the time. It's easy to get wrapped up and bogged down in life's "little messes." but I choose to keep my options open. I know that when I do my morning meditations AS I SHOULD then I can expect a miracle in my day and most days, many more than one miracle will occur for me. I expect a miracle and I'm never disappointed. Ask me about my sister coming by and sharing her love with me this morning in a way that was totally unexpected and totally appreciated. It started my day of miracles. And...it's not over yet! God is good!
I hope you are having a good day and looking for your own miracles. I have no doubt they are there for you. I'm sending a bubble love and light to all. A special bubble goes out to Anita's friend Rosemary who had surgery this morning and I'm lifting her up for a speedy recovery.
It IS a great day to be alive and all is well in my world.
Namaste!
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