A Vacation In My Mind

I have been up since 3:33am and here it is already 5:50am and I have accomplished only a couple of things this morning that were of interest to me.  I should never get online before I do the things I need to do because it is so distracting.

I watched a couple of interviews with Warren Haynes of the musical group "Government Mule" who I am going to see next month.  Warren Haynes also played with the Allman Brothers and Gregg Allman is one of my ALL TIME FAVORITES so from Warren, up popped interviews with Gregg so I had to watch about 4 of those and listen to a couple of YouTube Allman Brothers songs that I love.  Then, an ad for some adventure travel popped up so I went to that website and looked at the travel brochures for Scotland and other places I'd like to go. 

Next, because I wanted to know about the designer of my new eyeglasses (haven't gotten them yet but I will share when I do in a couple of weeks).  His name is Alain Mikli and he's a French designer and I can see why I was so drawn to his eyewear.  He's an artist and unconventional so that works for me.  I have ordered the coolest eyewear I have ever seen!  You're going to love it, too!

Of course, I read the news headlines just enough to do my daily head scratching and "what the..." when it comes to our current, geez, I find I can't even write it because the man just galls me and there is ABSOLUTELY nothing redeeming about him in my eyes.  So, I made that a quick pass because I like to start my day with as much positivity as I can muster.  I like to be aware of current events without getting sucked in the fracas that is live theater but not in an enjoyable way.  More like a horror movie.

So, from 3:33am (well, I did get up from my desk twice to get coffee) until now, I've just been putzing around on this computer and now it is time for me to get dressed and go to work.  However, it has been FUN and like a little "mini-vacation!"  I mean, I was in Scotland, Baja, Antartica, on a cruise, with my favorite musicians, engrossed in some awesome music so I will say the time was well spent and I don't resent a minute of my time spent this morning.  In fact, I consider it a gift!

It IS a great day to be alive and I am grateful for another day.  My quote for today is "STOP BEATING YOURSELF UP.  YOU ARE A WORK IN PROGRESS - WHICH MEANS YOU GET THERE A LITTLE AT A TIME, NOT ALL AT ONCE!"  That's good food for thought and the thought that pops up immediately is "where is there?"  More importantly, I think, is that we are all a work in progress and if we are doing our absolute best each day, when we lay down our heads at night we can give thanks for a day well spent.  So, I'm not going to beat myself up about how I spent my minutes this morning.  I had so much fun just putzing around and that's okay, too!

So, time to get dressed now and hit the door running.  Vacation is over until tomorrow. :-)

EXPECT A MIRACLE and give thanks when you get one.  God is good!  Hey...here's a bubble of Love and Light for you.  Feel it? 

The view from my window.  Good morning world it's a beautiful day!

THRIVE - A Work In Progress - STAY TUNED!

Since I've moved from Historic Downtown Buford, I'll be changing that header tonight after work (when I have more time! LOL).

I'll be starting a 6-week regime with Thrive Performance and Fitness Center in Odenton, Maryland.  I will be working with the head coach, Josh Ford and I will be blogging every step of the way in the hopes that my experience may be of benefit to others in creating their own healthy lifestyle.  However, as usual for Sabra, I'm running late this morning and don't have a lot of time to write.  One of my first goals is to become more disciplined and get myself up and at the keyboard earlier every day so I can write without feeling hurried.  I always seem to think there are more minutes in the moment than there ever are and I know I'm not the only one.

Anyhow, first the vision then the reality.  I WILL make this happen.  I have so much that I want to do when I step into the next chapter of my life in 3 or 4 or 5 (?) years and being healthy and active are a big part of it. "I have places to go and people to see!"

To that end, I will say...STAY TUNED!  It is a great day to be alive and I will share one of my motivational quotes from daily-motivational-quote.com.  "If you don't go after what you want, you'll never have it.  If you don't ask, the answer is always no.  If you don't step forward, you're always in the same place."  So keep doing and keep moving! 

Put some love out there in the world today.  Hug someone and remember to hold your loved ones close to your heart.  Sending a big bubble of LOVE and LIGHT out into the Universe for every one of us but especially for my children, grandchildren and my beloved friends.

Have an awesome day and EXPECT A MIRACLE!

August 19, 2018- Dallas, Texas

Music and Mumblings...

Sitting here relaxing tonight but my mind is going ninety to nothing.  So, I’m “writing it out” which is always a good thing for me.  I love to write and I can get a little wordy but isn’t that what authors do?

So, where to start tonight? 

Dr. Wayne Dyer.  He was an author and he said that if you do what you love, everything else will follow.  I believe him.  I  read all of his books and he never said anything that didn’t make complete sense to me.  He made me feel hopeful and good about myself and my spiritual path, which seemed to mirror his.  He transitioned last year and I sure miss his daily writings and reading him on Facebook and sharing his sage words of wisdom and motivation.  He may be on the other side but he is still here with me, a part of me because of the way I view life and because of how he touched my spirit.

He wrote about “manifesting your destiny” and I am working hard to manifest the destiny that I want in my final years before I, too, transition.  Before I can manifest, I have to get clear about what it is that I want.  Right now I am exactly where I need and want to be but I am dreaming and working toward manifesting the destiny I am dreaming.

I’m sitting here on my sofa on this Friday night and my little Chihuahua, Paco, is licking my leg right now which makes me giggle.  I love that little rascal so much.  He was, and is, one of my miracles.  I can’t honestly say I was expecting that miracle but God knows best and he brought him into my life and I’m so glad I was open to that miracle.  I’ve got a cold beer and I’m listening to Van Morrison radio on Pandora as I write.  Rambling Man by The Allman Brothers Band is playing and anyone that knows me knows that I absolutely love The Allman Brothers Band and Gregg Allman was supposed to be my next husband but he just never got the word.  “Blue Sky” playing now from the “Dreams” album.  Seems appropriate because I’m all about dreaming these days.

I’ve been divorced for 23 years now so I’ve been single almost as long as I was before I got married.  I was 25 and ready to be a wife and mother.  It was a dream and it happened.  Although I’m divorced I can honestly say I still love my ex-husband and we are good friends.  He is remarried and I like his wife and I am so happy that we can all be friends and have family get-togethers without any uncomfortable feelings.  We had our time and then, as Gregg Allman sang…it was time for moving on. We were together 20 years and three children came out of that time together and now we have seven grandchildren to share.  It was a good dream and I'm glad it became a reality.

Before the last two songs, “Landslide” by Stevie Nicks played.  That’s the song my son chose for us to dance to when he got married and I can’t hear that son without getting a little heart-twinge for so many reasons.  I was honored he chose that song and my son is one of my many, many blessings in this life.

I feel fortunate to have had, and still have, so many of my good friends in my life. “For What It’s Worth” by Buffalo Springfield playing now.  So much of my life I can relive in an instant just by hearing a song.  My life has been filled with music and it’s hard to separate living and music.  It’s a “my generation” thing I think.

Like I said, my mind is going ninety to nothing tonight and I’m bouncing around all over the place here, aren’t I.  Do you ever do that?

Since this is a 3-day weekend because Memorial Day is Monday, I’m going to spend time with my friends that live up in Dahlonega for the weekend.  I feel a little guilty because there is so much yard work and house work that needs to be done but I wouldn’t miss spending time with my friends because, at this point in my life, I realize the importance of not putting those things off. 

Three people who were very important in my life passed away last year.  My Mom, a dear friend and the person I thought was the love of my life.  I hadn’t seen my friend in a while and I’d always “been meaning” to call her and get together and then it was too late because she was gone.

“Can’t you see” by The Marshall Tucker Band from the “Searchin’ for a Rainbow” album playing now.  Wow, so much good music on this Van Morrison station.  Can you remember where you were when you first heard that song?  I can.  I remember a waterbed that the heater had gone out on and sleeping on blankets that would slip off and I’d be freezing my butt off by morning or so snuggled up next to Tim you couldn’t get a pin between us.  Good memories!

Anyhow, I’ve decided not to let an opportunity to spend time with a friend pass me by.  I’ve been on the go for the past five weeks and next weekend I’m promising myself a “down” week end when I catch up on some of the things I’ve been letting slide but I’ll think about that tomorrow, or next week or maybe I won’t even think about it until next Saturday or Sunday.  There are more important things to think about right now.

“If I Ever Needed Someone” by Van Morrison playing now.  It speaks to my heart and makes me want to get up and close my eyes and sway with the music.  His voice always does that to me.  Beautiful, instense, passionate Van Morrison.  There’s no one current who can compare.

“The Weight” by The Band now.  I guess listening to “my music” makes me remember my youth and the dreams of my youth.  I’m no longer young but I feel like I’m about to graduate again.  Retirement is a couple of years down the road and big changes are coming for me.  Good things are happening and every day I expect a miracle and I’m not disappointed. 

So, with that having been said, I’m going to get up and start doing a little light housekeeping and getting my stuff together to take off with Paco tomorrow.  My sister lives in the house right next to me and my neighbor on the other side is always watching my house AND I ALWAYS put a big bubble of Light around my house whenever I go away to protect it but I leave with no fear knowing I have people I trust looking out for me and for my home.

“Fortunate Son” by CCR playing now.  Takes me back to the days when I became an anti-war protestor, not that it did any good.  There’s more war in this world today than ever and it breaks my heart.  I still want to believe that we can all love each other and live in peace but I don’t see it happening in my lifetime.  It’s Memorial Day on Monday and I honor all those who served and if I let myself think on it too much, my heart gets heavy.  I don’t think I want to go there now.

I feel fortunate to have been born in the time and the place I was born.  Life has been good.  It hasn’t always been easy and I wouldn’t want it to be because if you don’t have sadnesses and make mistakes, how can you grow as a human being?  I believe I came here to grow spiritually.  I’m working on that every day.

I say good-night now while “Hotel California” by the Eagles is playing.  Oh California!  So many memories there but that’s for another day.

Expect a miracle and give thanks when you get it! Namaste everyone.

Don't Stop Dreaming!

Oh boy, do I have a dream. 

I'm a couple of years from retirement but I have started dreaming and planning for that day.  It is bubbling up inside of me and I feel like I am about to pop so I've decided I need to "write it out."

Having moved, often, in my life, I set a couple of life goals for myself.  One was to own my own home and I do.  One was to live in the same house for 10 years and as of September 2015, I reached that goal.  Another was to work at the same job for 5 years and as of May 23rd, 2016, I reached that goal, too.

Now, I'm ready for a new goal, a new dream.  I want to travel across the United States in a Little Guy pulled behind a small SUV I've yet to buy.  Well, I've yet to buy either but I've started dreaming and that's the first step to manifesting the reality.  I'm ready to sell my house and live free of debt and responsibility. But first, I have two more years of work ahead of me which should be just enough time to get my ducks in a row.

I'll blog more about my process because there is SO MUCH to be done before I hit the road with Paco, my little Chihuahua.  He will be an awesome traveling companion.

Also, after 23 years of being single, I feel like there's one last love in store for me and I will meet him when I hit the road.  He's there and I know it will be magic when we meet.  Hold on, I'm coming!

With that having been said, it's time for me to get back to my job! 

EXPECT A MIRACLE, BELIEVE IT CAN HAPPEN AND IT WILL!

Wine, Women and Writers

Wine, Women and Writers

Below is a post that I meant to put up on September 25th and here it is October 18th already.  I have been busy writing and creating and that has kept me busy but I do want to get back to writing this blog more regularly.

I've been thinking about what someone said to me because it has bothered me and I have to go deep to understand why.  He said "you are living in the past."  I guess it bothered me because it is partly true. I have vivid memories of the past which I hold close so I don't forget them because I want to write about them and hope that maybe someday, my experiences will resonate with others and help them in some way to be better or to have a better life or feel better about themselves. Also, I hope my children and grandchildren will read my words and see me as a person and not just Mom or Meme (what my grandchildren call me) because although I AM those things and love being Mom/Meme but I want them to someday see a more complete picture of a woman living, loving, laughing, hurting, crying, sad, the full gamut of emotions and experiences.  When they read my words, it is THE PAST and I will be living there because the past holds pieces of us.

I also live in the FUTURE because I have dreams and goals and places I want to go and see and people I want to visit and all of them are in the future and some may not happen but a lot of them will.  I do believe that if I "put it out there" (dream it) it will happen, in some way.  Not always as I foresee but I get what I want when I am clear about it.  I think this is healthy and a good way to positive self-project.

I also live in the RIGHT NOW.  I am aware of all of my senses as I write this blog.  I can smell the oil I put on when I got out of my shower a few minutes ago.  I can hear a bird singing outside my open window.  I can see this screen and the words forming as I write and they are transferred from my thoughts into something more concrete.  I can feel the keys as I type.  I can (almost) taste the eggs and grits I'm going to make for breakfast when I finish this post.

I think what bothered me the most about his statement was that I let what he thought create insecurity in me. I LET his words be a truth, for a moment.  However, I KNOW there is so much more to me and it makes me a little sad that he doesn't see it but that's his stuff and not mine.  So, I've thought about and I have come to the conclusion that he is right but he is also so very WRONG.  I am a 3-dimensional person and I live in the past, the present and the future and that's a very GOOD thing, don't you think?

Anyhow, that's it for this morning.  It is a GREAT day to be alive in America.  The sun is shining, the temperature is perfect and after breakfast, I am going to have some fun doing those things that I need and want to do and completely enjoying, on all levels, this gift of a day.  I expect a miracle! And so it is.

September 25, 2015 – “Wine, Women and Writers”

On a rainy Thursday night at 6:30pm, September 24, 2015, our newly formed writer’s group, which we are calling Wine, Women and Writing, held it’s first meeting at Sabe’s Place in Historic Downtown Buford, Georgia. 

First, we discussed the organization and schedule of our little group which consisted of Lynn and 2 Sabra’s.  Yes, 2 Sabra’s.  Sabra B. and Sabra R.  Mallorie will be at the next meeting but she wasn’t feeling well last night and maybe another writer named, Judy.  My friend, Tracy, will probably be a drop in from to time.  Among the three of us attending last night, we agreed that we want to keep the group small and intimate.

Lynn and I drank Champagne while the other Sabra drank water.  She’s more of a writer than a wine drinker but me, I can go either way! If we are going to call our group, “Wine, Women and Writer’s” we have to drink some wine, don’t we?

It was my idea to form a Writer’s Group and something I’ve wanted to do for a couple of years.  Part of the reason I wanted to have a Writer’s Group is to help me become more focused on my writing and if I can help other people along the way then a good thing has happened, as far as I am concerned.  I researched “Starting a Writer’s Group” online and found a wealth of information.  I have been in several writing groups over the years and I had an idea of how I wanted the Writer’s Group I formed to be and now I have manifested exactly what I wanted.  It is a great little group and I know we will learn from and help each other and grow from this experience.

We each shared something we had written.  Sabra B. and Sabra R. shared poetry while Lynn shared a “slice of life” piece she had written.  Through our writing we learned a little more about each other and I look forward to exploring with these women in the months and maybe years ahead.  I think we have great potential and we have enough similarities to enjoy each other’s company and enough differences to challenge each other and help each other grow.

I shared the extent of my journals and they were suitably impressed.  I didn’t share the content but the volume.  I have written journals for years and I do it, in part, for posterity so that someday, my grandchildren and great-grandchildren will be able to read my journals and to know me and know how life was during the time I am alive because the rate of change is happening so much faster than it did between my time and my Grandmother’s time.  I can only imagine the world of my great-grandchildren but I have no doubt it will be significantly different in some ways but exactly the same in others.   I also write for my children because I am the keeper of the “stories” of their lives, whether they know it now or not.  I am sure it will be more meaningful to them when I have transitioned.

We concluded the evening with cheese, crackers, dips and fruit.  Around 9:30pm, Sabra B. and Lynn each left with their hand outs (and “homework”) to help prepare for our next meeting in two weeks.  It was a fun, productive evening of “Wine, Women and Writing!”

Ovid's "Metamorphoses: XV" - Speaking of Death and Time

Time is something we never seem to have enough of and death is something that awaits us all.  Both have been on my mind this morning.  It is Sunday and my weekend is almost over and then it is back to work tomorrow and there was so much more I wanted to accomplish in my "two days off" but here it is, Sunday afternoon, and I'm just getting around to doing some of what should have already been done.  I need more time!

Death is something I've had coming  up in almost every single month of this year.  Friends are passing on.  Family and people I've admired are passing on.  It makes me sit up and take note of my own mortality and wonder how much time I have to accomplish those things I feel I must?  I need more time!

So, I grabbed a book from my library this morning, looking for some inspiration and noticed a page I'd bookmarked on another day that I can't remember.  Wouldn't you know it is about time and death?  (Expect a miracle and don't discount it!)  I opened to Ovid's poem Metamorphoses: XV where he is talking of the teachings of Pythagoras:

"O mortals,
Dumb in cold fear of death, why do you tremble
At Stygian rivers, shadows, empty name,
The lying stock of poets, and the terrors
Of a false world? I tell you that your bodies
Can never suffer evil, whether fire
Consumes them, or the waste of time.  Our souls
Are deathless; always, when they leave our bodies."

 He goes on to say:

"All things are always changing,
But nothing dies. The spirit comes and goes,
...but always it keeps on living."

"Full sail, I voyage
Over the boundless ocean, and I tell you
Nothing is permanent in all the world.
All things are fluent; every image forms,
Wandering through change. Time is itself a river
In constant movement, and the hours flow by
Like water, wave on wave, pursued, pursuing
Forever fugitive, forever new.
That which has been, is not; that which was not,
Begins to be; motion and moment always
In process of renewal."

Did I mention this was written in 6 BC?  It is an amazing poem and the book I picked up was "The Norton Anthology of World Masterpieces"  and I have had it since my college days and have referred to it now and again over the years. (English Literature class at San Diego City College)

So, the soul lives on and time is an illusion.  Nothing new under the sun is there?

We had a nice storm blow through last night and today, my landscaper came and we did some cleaning up and everything looks good again.  All the trees shook off their dead limbs and no one was hurt so it's all good!  I sat in my car for a while this morning after taking a ride down Buford Dam Road which is really pretty ride through lots of green trees and I felt refreshed and rejuvenated when I got back so I just sat there, watching the trees dance as the wind blew through them. 

Sunday, the beginning of a new.  The end of the old.  Time flows on and today, I expected a miracle and I was not disappointed.  Today was awesome and the best is yet to come.  And so it is!

Expect a miracle, my friends.  You won't be disappointed.

September 23, 2015 - Expect a Miracle and hello, again!

September 23, 2015

A couple of years down the road since my last post and I have yet to go back and read earlier posts but I will.

Life changes, seconds turn into minutes, minutes to hours and now a couple of years have passed in what seems the blink of an eye.  It almost makes me want to do a post on Quantum Physics but no, when I start blogging I seem to be operating on so many levels at once, all crying for a voice, so I have to focus. Focus on the message of today and what I want to share.

Hope and belief are my focus for the next few minutes.  I want to share my hope.  Hope that today is going to be an awesome day.  Belief that I have the power to make it so.  I expect a miracle in my life every single day and if I slow down, think about it, review at the end of the day, I can find those miracles.  Sometimes, as they occur, I remember to say "Thank you, God, Goddess, All There Is!"

Dr. Wayne Dyer has transitioned.  My Reid has transitioned.  Other friends and family are transitioning at an accelerated rate as I grow older.  Life is changing, as it always is and it's good.  Those people will be missed but they are also a huge part of who I AM.  Dr. Dyer used to talk about I AM.  I AM so much more than me but I AM.  Got to love it!  :-)

Time to move into my day.  More blogs to come.  I'm starting a Writer's Group and tomorrow night is our first meeting.  It's called "Wine, Women and Writing" and it's not that men are not invited, it's just there aren't any out there who want to come to a Writer's Group in Buford, Georgia so it's all women, which is okay.  We will support, motivate and help each other which, after all, is a big part of what LIFE is about, isn't it?

Look for your miracles today.  Tiny or Large.  What touches your heart, your soul, your spirit?  Open yourself to the Divine and allow goodness and love to permeate your being.

It is a great day to be alive, life has been good, and the BEST is yet to come.  EXPECT A MIRACLE and you'll get one.  And so it is!

Short and Sweet

I am astounded by the number of comments I've been receiving and promise to get back to writing (thinking on paper) soon.  Since I started back to work, there hasn't been much time and most of my meandering is done in my journal.  However, I guess there are others like me and if I say one thing that makes another person think more positively or feel better about their own Self then I guess the miracle has already occurred.

Walking to my gate yesterday, I noticed three brilliant wild Iris poking up, beckoning to me and I thanked God for the miracle of beautiful Iris in the dead of winter.  I love when 3 comes into my consciousness but that's a discussion for another day when I have more time.

For now, Expect a Miracle...and don't discount it when you receive it! 

Love & Light...Sabra

Fabulous Friday

Creativity Workshops started on Wednesday and will run for the next 6-8 weeks, depending on how far we get and how quickly we get there. It is time for further self-exploration and I am starting anew the journey of a thousand steps.

I've been trying to "push" time the past few weeks and it's not working. No matter how hard I try to pretend there may be 80 seconds in a minute, I am constantly reminded there are only 60. So, yes...I've been "running late." I'm working on it as I want to be punctual as much as the next person but something about me wants to "push" time. Wonder why?

Nothing is coming this morning...am I blocked...seem to be. Does that ever happen to you? Nothing to do but jump in the shower and get on with the day, trying to see the beauty in every moment. I have to remind myself that there is beauty in every moment if I only take the time to look. Simple things are sometimes the hardest to accomplish.

So...CARPE DIEM! Look for the beauty, arrive on time, expect a miracle! Got it! Go get 'em!

Monday mornings...

are insane! So much I wanted to accomplish this morning before going to work and yet here I sit, still in my gown, still in my bed, writing paraphenalia spread all around me on the bed and I am so mad at myself for letting these moments slip by this morning. I find that my biggest challenge and my greatest battle are with my very own self.

On a spiritual and mental level (most times) I am right where I want and need to be but it is the PHYSICAL that gets me and that's what I came here to straighten out, I guess. I keep getting messages about persistence (or lack of), indolence, and defeat and they are usually relative to the "physical" so...okay. I GET IT! This morning, my message is about successful communication and FEAR OF DEFEAT.

So then, I have to think about what it is that I am afraid of and at the same time I am told that fear is irrational in nature and doesn't necessarily reflect the real situation. Okay, so I get that too and my affirmation for that is "I ACCEPT MY FEAR AND LET IT GO." The only problem is that I'm not sure what it is that I am afraid of...oh, hold on...it's coming to me...okay, I got. Yep. I got it. FEAR OF LOSING CONTROL.

Immediately after comes the thought that control is an illusion. Oh, it is Monday morning and I really don't want to be thinking that hard this morning. I want to be "la-la-la" in the shower getting ready to face the day. Oh, how funny...now that little voice in my head (or the angel on my shoulder, if you prefer) is whispering "who's the boss of YOU?" Well, I guess that would be me so I'm about to finish this blog, jump in the shower and move into my day knowing it is going to be a GREAT day because I am the "master (mistress?)" of my reality and I am going to create a wonderful day for myself! I am IN CONTROL! Hah!

So, I didn't get the things done this morning (or yesterday or the day before) that I wanted to but did other things (like spend time with my daughter and grandchildren instead of going to visit my dear friend who is in town for only a few days from D.C. and I am feeling so guilty for not going to see her already and I didn't spend time getting my hair colored which I absolutely hate to do anyhow and I didn't get anything done around my house and I have a workshop here on Wednesday and on and on and who IS in control of getting all of these things done if it isn't me?...oh, that's right, I have a "fear of losing control." Guess I walked right into that one!

So, okay, I'm just letting all of that go for now and I'm going to get in the shower and enjoy my day, my job, my friends at work and later today, after work, I will do some of those things that I didn't get done already (color hair/organize house for workshop/etc.) and tomorrow I will leave work a little early and drive over to visit my friend and it's ALL GOOD and it's ALL OKAY and I forgive myself for not being more proactive over the weekend. Guess I just needed a break. That's okay.

I did have my daughter stop at the RV place where I go to dream (because it was on our way to where we were going). She walked through the two Class C RV's that are parked there and I stayed in the car with Ethan because I've walked through those two RV's more than once and she was excited when she got back to the car and said which one she liked more and that it would be PERFECT for me! It was fun to pull her into my dream!

So, okay, on with the day! My affirmations for today are: (Spiritual) - Creative expression fulfills and makes me happy. (Mental)I am self-confident and self-accepting. (Physical)I accept my fear and let it go!

Since I live my life in Divine flow, I know there's a reason for everything and it's not always a reason I am meant to know at the moment or maybe ever but my job, is to keep going...keep looking for the good in everyone and everything...keep trying to do better than I did the day before and be the best human being I can possibly be and when I am not living up to my own expectations, then it is up to me, and only me, to make the changes I need to make to be who I want and who I am meant to be.

What do you think?

Wishing you a wonderful day! It is a great day to be alive in America and the best is yet to come. Expect a miracle!

Here I am with my booth at the Christmas Arts and Crafts Show in 2010. I was expressing my creative potential and having fun doing it! Namaste

Sunday mornings...

are so precious! It has been forever since I last wrote but it has been an interesting time of challenges and growth and I know the best is yet to come!

I am still working at the job close to my home and loving it. It is a blessing and I sincerely hope I can ride it out for the next five years. It is an awesome, stable company with a lot of terrific people and I believe it will be a nice period at the end of the sentence which has been my "career." I haven't really had a career as much as a journey which like a feather in the wind has landed me in some beautiful places and only a few that were not so beautiful...three, to be exact so that's not so bad! Those I dust off and hang tight to the ones that were exciting and from which I learned so much, not only about life and business, but about myself.

I'm at a place in life where I am forced to see myself as one who is near the end of one adventure but soon (in 5 years if all goes as planned) to begin a new and exciting adventure. I want to travel and it is seething in my blood, my spirit, my emotions...my very soul is straining to be free and to visit every beautiful place God has created in this wonderful place I chose to incarnate called the UNITED STATES. In my mind, I'm already heading down the highway, Class C RV readied for the trip and San Diego, here I come. Up the coast highway to Vancouver...oh, I could go on for hours. It will truly be the BIG ADVENTURE!

Now, I need a partner. Someone to share the expense and the driving and the FUN that is to be had. I am about to manifest (maybe not immediately but soon) a "traveling man" who loves rock and roll music (loud) because that's my traveling music; who is strong and healthy and loves to bike and hike and take a new road he's never been down before; someone who may not necessarily believe as I do but will accept my spirituality as part of who I am and love me for it; someone who will pull over and let me paint for three or four hours while he amuses himself in his own creative adventure; he will love to laugh and must love children because the grandkids will certainly be a part of my traveling somewhere down the road; someone who will give the peace and space in the morning and not want to talk as soon as our eyes open...must have my coffee and meditation time; someone who enjoys the silence as much as the loudness; who can listen to all kinds of music, depending on the moment...loud, raucous rock and soft, soothing, spiritual music; someone who will love, honor and respect me (but not MARRY me because I'm done with that part of my life) and in turn, I WILL DO THE SAME FOR HIM! So, if you are out there, and you happen to read this blog, let me know you're there because I'm ready to start planning our first trip!

So, okay, that having been said. Everything else in life is beautiful. My best pet friend, Wiz, is almost 16 and his energy and health are waning and I know soon I will miss him so much. It broke my heart to take him for a walk and realize he couldn't make it around the circuit we one travelled easily. I had to pick him up and carry him home, crying (me) all the way. I am really going to miss his energy and his unconditional love when he crosses that rainbow bridge but I am indelibly changed by all that he brought to my life. I learned so much from him and many times when I was out walking him and I'd notice something beautiful in nature or just in the morning or whenever, I would thank God for Wiz for otherwise, I would have missed that little nugget of gold.

My grandchildren are all healthy and happy, children are healthy, happy, productive, contributing human beings so I feel very good about them.

Personal life...awesome! Professional life...awesome! Love life...more to come! Adventure...on the horizon!

So...on to CREATIVITY! I am facilitating a new series of creativity workshops beginning February 1st so I'm sure I will be sharing more via the blog because writing is how I "think it out!" Hope you come along for the ride. I am hoping to unblock or "reopen" some of the places within from which the joy flows. I am hoping to begin painting again soon. I know my spirit needs it and cries for it. If I can help myself and help others at the same time then a miracle will have occurred and I will once again, believe that Wayne Dyer is my very own muse (can a man be a muse, too? I guess I'll have to Google it later!).

After two years of "working on it" I finally self-published "Simply Sabra" in December and was able to give it as gifts to a chosen few for Christmas and it was well received. The book was a compilation of short poems written between 1974 and 2011 so it was a span of life and a fun walk through the memories of time for me. Releasing it felt almost like walking naked on stage in front of an audience because I was so open and also so vulnerable because I was honest about everything FROM MY POINT OF VIEW. Truly, can be anything else?

Now, to "seize my day!" I expect a miracle today and so should you! It IS a great day to be alive in America and the best is yet to come.

These are some of my Angel creations!

Namaste!

Time whizzes by...

I can't believe it has been 10 days since I last wrote. My goal is to write a little every day so I need to "try harder!"

My new job is challenging, fun and has allowed me to have some hopes and dreams again that had been tucked away for "later" and "later" is NOW! I've some new found motivation and started an exercise/diet regiment yesterday. I'm not even thinking about what to eat and what not to eat but I am simply thinking about giving my body what it needs to produce the energy that I need. I have so many things I still want to accomplish and to do it, I need ENERGY and strength. My dream right now goes back to the same dream I had in 2008 when the bottom fell out of my world for a short while. I am dreaming of a rafting trip, down the Colorado river through the Grand Canyon. I am thinking "Best of the Grand" and the url is http://www.canyoneers.com so you can check it out and join me! Next August maybe???

It seems the older I get the faster time passes and the more I want to accomplish. Yet when I look back in my journals, I marvel at what I was able to accomplish in a day. Time is an illusion anyhow! So, with that having been said, the reality is that I need to jump in the shower and get to work!

Hope you have a wonderful day today. Expect a miracle and you'll surely get one. Namaste!

T.G.I.F.

After a full week of work, the weekend has taken on new meaning for me! I have had a terrific week and I love my job, the people there, and the commute is so sweet! From my driveway to the driveway at work is 2 miles! How AWESOME is that?!

It's about time for me to jump in the shower but right at this moment, it is peaceful here. Wizzie is spread out on the bed beside me, snoring his little doggy snore. He has a way of moving the bed covers around with his paws to get it "just right" and then he circles a little and finally plops down. He likes a little pillow, too. Who knew dogs could have such personalities? That would be a silly question to my friends who live in Murfreesboro, Tennessee. They have a rescue home for Golden Retrievers and would look at me as if I had an extra head if I asked that question of them. God bless those who have rescue homes!

A slow week for news about my young Mr. Robert Pattinson but he's filming a new movie. Less than six months more to wait for "Breaking Dawn" but I am sure it will be an event for me and "my girls!" I'll let you know what we cook up.

A long weekend coming up and I have a secret desire to work on Monday. Is that wrong? I just want to go to my job. Not my call so I will celebrate Monday, remember the reason for the holiday and spend the day with my family. I plan to write, read and relax this weekend and if the mood hits...I have canvas sitting there blank, calling to me.

Wishing you a safe and happy weekend and holiday! Remember to share your love and be good to your own self, too. It IS a great day to be alive and the best is yet to come! And so it is!

Namaste!

Doomsday or expecting a miracle?

It is a GREAT day to be alive here in beautiful downtown Buford. I drove down Main Street while waiting for the train to pass so I could cross to my side and it is such a lovely little town. I noticed a family out walking together and several other people getting their exercise in the early morning after I dropped Wiz off for his grooming. Small town, USA and it is quaint, rustic and sweet. I love it here although I know I shall leave someday but this is a time when I am making a memory.

I am compassionate towards the "doomsday" Christians because they are so sure the world is going to end tomorrow and the rapture is going to occur. I wonder how they will adjust when what they believed so completely does not happen. There was a time, in 1975, when I was a newly "born again" Christian and I was on street corners passing out leaflets and spreading the "good word" and trying to help others save their soul. It was an interesting time for me and I'm glad I had that experience but it was fleeting. Once I began to question the teachings the veil of illusion was lifted and life got back to being more normal. I guess it was what I needed at the time and perhaps this is what the "doomsdayers" need in their life at this time, too. I wonder what they are doing with their "last" day. How will they spend it knowing they will be raptured tomorrow? Will it be in prayer, fasting, saying goodbye to loved ones? What will they do on Monday is the bigger question, I think, when they find the rapture has not occurred and life goes on? Will the veil of illusion be lifted for them, too? Life goes on.

For me, Monday is much anticipated as I begin my new job that I have searched so hard to find. I am beginning a new adventure and looking forward to meeting new people and having new purpose in my life. The past couple of years have been difficult for me but a time of growing and learning and becoming more of who I am meant to be in this life. Even in the midst of so much turmoil, I could find joy in the day and constantly reminded myself that happiness is an inside job. It's my responsibility to my own Self to find my place of peace and happiness and I accept that responsibility. I fly solo and I am still a soul searcher! Life goes on.

There is too much to be grateful for in this life to live in fear that it is going to end. It is going to end and that's a certainty. Yet not today so live this day in the best way you know how and enjoy the gifts and the miracles that will come your way as they surely will.

I cleaned the carpet in my newly vacated spare room yesterday. I opened the windows and let the fresh air in and the stale air out and it feels happier in there already. Mom lived there for a while and I was happy to have her there. A friend of mine lived there for a while and I was happy to have her there, too. Now, it is mine alone again and I will make it into my studio and I will be happy to have ME in there! Next weekend I will do a clearing of the energy in the room using sage and prayers and then I will begin setting up my studio so I can create again. I've missed having the space to paint, write, make cards and draw. I feel another level of being beginning. A new adventure on more levels than one and that is life, isn't it? Nothing is static and everything is always changing, at least in my life and I wouldn't have it any other way.

I wrote two new poems yesterday and worked a little on a book I am helping edit. I am hoping to have my book of poetry completed so I can gift it at Christmas to my family and a few friends. I had to make myself stay on task because when I start opening boxes and footlockers that have been stored away, I get caught up in looking at what's in the boxes and reminisce about the memories contained therein. I am a keeper of the memories and what is in those boxes and footlockers are the history of my life and my children's life. I consider each memory a pearl in the necklace of my life and treasure them as they are priceless.

Do you journal or have keepsakes tucked away in a box somewhere? I've tried to teach my children to do that but I don't think it is as important to them as it is to me yet someday, I believe they will appreciate that I was the "keeper of the memories." Perhaps it is important to me because I did not have stability in my life as we moved so often. I like that I was constantly having a new adventure but part of me has always envied those who were born, lived and stayed in the same place and my dearest friends are people whose lives were such. They balance me in that way because that was not my path in this life.

Well, I'm rambling so that means it's time for me to get productive as there is much to be accomplished today. There are memories to be made and tonight I will be spending time with my grandchildren and that's always fun for me. So, carpe diem! If this is the last day, then let's make it the best!

The angel was gift from my son and his wife and the angel is holding up a lantern. I love that angel, not only because they gave it to me which makes it special to my heart but because I enjoy the image of an angel to show me the way. I am expecting a miracle today. How about you? Remember, the best is yet to come! And so it is.

Namaste!

Oh, Happy Day!

It is such a happy day for me and I am in a place of gratitude for my MAJOR miracle. Yesterday, I got the job I most wanted and it is so perfect for me and only 2 miles from my home. I start Monday and I am joyful and anticipating a wonderful new adventure.

My energy work has paid off and all the prayers of friends helped, too. It was a collective effort and God is good! I don't even have the words (and you know I can always find words!) to describe how happy I feel as a result of finding the job. Getting to this new plateau has been a tough uphill climb yet here I stand and the better I am for the climb. My knees are bloody, shoes worn bare, dirt smeared across my forehead but I am satisfied and fortified by the experience! It has been an adventure frought with dangers and joys along the way and so may "helpers" to get this point in the journey.

First, I helped another without expectation of anything other than making someone else's life better. I did it without thought but felt what I call "God on my heart." When I "feel" that, I just do whatever feels right because I know it is not really me but God working through me. I sacraficed my own life to do this. Eventually, it was apparent that it was time for a change and change does not always occur without some pain. Have you experienced that to be true in your own life?

Still, by holding on to faith and hope, and the belief that there is something better coming I got through that time and came out on the other side. So many times in life when I try to control a situation, I am not to gently reminded that although I do have free will, when I allow myself to be guided by my "inner voice" then everything seems to flow so much more easily. Divine flow. It's a beautiful thing.

Not only that, but any goodness that I gave, came back to multiplied. I can't even begin to thank my friends and family who came to my "rescue" when all way dark and I couldn't see that light at the end of the tunnel. My heart and spirit have been so touched by the love and generosity of others and everyday a new miracle occurred and bolstered my faith in my friends and family. I am so blessed.

So, I expected a miracle and I got a really big one! Monday, the new adventure begins and it will feel so great to be back in an office for a few more years (I hope) and it's a great company to be with to put the period on the end of my career (when it comes time!).

Still, I took to the future and the day I see Buford in my rear view mirror as I pull off in my little RV heading WEST to California. But that's a story for another day and there's a lot of living and many adventures before that happens.

So, for today, I say, expect a miracle and hang on to your dreams! They can come true.

From the window of my hotel at the foot of Macchu Picchu. Now THAT is a mountain!

Expecting a miracle...

I interviewed for a job yesterday that I really would enjoy, working for a good company and terrific people and the commute would be a matter of minutes. It is so perfect for me so today, I really am expecting a miracle. I am hoping to hear that I am hired and when I need to report for my first day at work.

Am I nervous? Yes! I want this job so badly and not only that, but I need it. My meditation today was a good one and I was reminded that I am "guided by destiny" which is just another way to say that I am in divine flow so only that which is for my higher and better good will occur. Even though I want this job the Universe may have something else in store for me so I have made the conscious choice to stop worrying, which is a useless and non-productive thing to do anyhow.

I am changing my focus RIGHT NOW! Very shortly, I am meeting one of my dear friends from high school (so we're definitely "old" friends!) in Dawsonville and we are going to do "girly-things" and have lunch together. It will be fun and I am looking forward to seeing her.

I read a quote this morning by Robert Frost who said "In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life. It goes on." No wonder I love Robert Frost because he nailed it. It goes on. No matter what befalls us, if we look at every day as a gift, then no matter what comes our way, we can "go on." I needed to hear that this morning. If I get this job, I will be ecstatic for many reasons and life will go on. If I don't get this job, I will be disappointed but know there is something better in store for me and life will go on.

I believe that as long as I am breathing, there is hope. So, I am putting my "will I get this job" worries in an imaginary jeweled box that glitters and delights and I'm putting it on the shelf where I will come back later today and release it. But right now, in this gift of a moment, I'm jumping in the shower and getting ready to go enjoy what I know is going to be a wonderful day filled with love, friendship, fun and hopefully, some good food!

I will tellyou know tomorrow if I got the job (or not..but I am feeling positive!). We may all need to celebrate the end of a long dry-spell and the beginning of a great new adventure for me!

Either way, it IS a great day to be alive and the best is yet to come! Have some fun for your own SELF today! Smile and know that you are loved.

She is waiting for a miracle, too!

Namaste, my friends!

"So beautiful or so what?"

I watched Paul Simon on Saturday Night Live and he sang a song (of course!) and the chorus lyrics were "Life is what you make of it, so beautiful or so what!" Actually, I'm watching it at 6:30am on Sunday morning because I "DVRed" (that's a verb?) it so I can fast forward through the commercials. It offends me to have to pay for cable TV and then have to watch commercials. That's not what I want to write about this morning though (aren't you glad?!)

"Life is what you make of it, so beautiful or so what!"

[a couple of hours later...]
I got that far earlier and then I wrote, deleted, wrote, deleted, wrote, deleted until the Universe REALLY got my attention by shutting down my connection to the internet. At that point I said, "Okay! I get it!" I turned off the computer and went into the kitchen to do my "morning work." I knew there was a message and it wasn't coming through until I had completed my morning work and meditation.

The Universe provided me with a great message and I am excited about Monday's potential because I have another job interview but I AM LIVING IN THE RIGHT THIS MINUTE and it's all beautiful, oh yes!

I usually close my blogs with "Namaste!" and I've been asked what "namaste" means so let me share with you. Mahatma Gandhi said that in India, when people use the word "namaste" they are saying "I honor the place within you where the entire Universe resides; I honor the place within you of love, of light, of truth, of peace; I honor that place within you, where, when you are in that place in you, and I am in that place in me, there is only one of us." Now I ask you, what could be more beautiful than the meaning of "namaste," according to Mahatma Gandhi? It is honoring GOD and the place in each of us where GOD is and connecting us to the other person and EVERYTHING that is because we are all a part of the Universe or God. It makes me feel unlimited and miniscule at the same time and it's beauty is simplicity.

So, keeping it short and sweet this morning, I say to you, my reader, NAMASTE! With "prayer hands" in front of my heart, head slightly bent, I say to you, NAMASTE!

May you make your life so beautiful today! Remember, it IS a great day to be alive and the best is yet to come! And so it is!

This is a gift I painted (or let the Universe paint through me) for my son:

Lazing about on Saturday morning!

An Alaskan sunrise from 2005 that I just felt like sharing. I've been sitting here in bed since 6:30am (so almost five hours) doing absolutely nothing. I had my latte and a devil's food cupcake with vanilla icing and that's all I've accomplished today other than letting Wizard out so he could take care of his business. I'm just lazing about and that's okay. It's a gift I give to myself occasionally. I am sure everyone could benefit from a lazy morning. I spend so much time either thinking about what needs to be done or doing what needs to be done that it feels good to let that all go for a minute. It will be there when I'm ready to get active again.

I have been pushing hard and being so aggressive about my job search and it takes a lot out of me. I think it would be easier, and less tiring, to sell beachfront property in Arizona than it is to sell ME to a recruiter or a potential employer. There is a good reason I'm not a salesperson. I don't enjoy it! I want to present the facts, step away, and let the other arrive at their own conclusion or decision about those facts. I know it doesn't work that way though. We have to finesse the facts, highlight the facts that are pertinent to the "buyer" and oh! I am getting a headache just thinking about it and I choose not to let it ruin my relaxing, lazy morning! I present myself and just don't understand why I am not immediately chosen (as I have been in the past) because my skills are above average and my experience is varied. Oh, there I go again...thinking about it (which is just as tiring!)...change the thought, Sabra. Back to "relax..." Just breath!

Okay, I'm relaxed! Jen, Ian and Ethan came over to spend the evening with me last night. We had dinner and then baked a cake for Jen to take home and some cupcakes to eat immediately (one of which I had for breakfast). I steam mopped the living room, hall and kitchen before they got here because Ethan, at 7 months, is crawling all over the place. I am happy to say his knees were not even dirty when they left so I guess it was a good idea to give the floors a once over before they got here.

Ian, who is three, had to have a bath at Mimi's. He played with the same toys I bought when Austin, who is now 15, was a baby. It makes me feel good when they have fun tub-time at Mimi's. It makes me feel very, very happy whenever they are at my house and I love each of them in their own special way. My niece came over to visit last night, too. Ian is crazy about her and they were sitting together in the chair and it was too cute.

I don't have much to talk about of merit today. Just rambling. Jess is back in Connecticut and hating it and we miss her. Josh is in Costa Rica with his girlfriend and loving it. Jen is finding that being a stay-at-home Mom has it's challenges and "adult conversation" takes on new meaning. Lisa is thinking about a new job although she loves her current one. Keeping her options open and that's smart.

I surfed around this morning, spent time on Facebook and was shocked when I saw the profile picture of my 10-year-old niece. I would not allow my 10-year-old to be on Facebook but she has something like 71 friends and most of them are about the same age. I can remember when Jen was about 14 and I was just letting her have e-mail and yes, I did go in and lurk about her e-mails and I found pictures some young boy had sent to her and he was exposing his junk and very proud of it. So, I had to block her e-mail from getting any photos. I had parental controls and blocked everything but the bare minimum and I was a "mean" Mom. I once read that the greatest compliment your child can give you is to call you a "Mean Mom!" This is a new day, though, with access to the Internet and everything on it so different than it was only a few years ago. I learned my granddaughter had stumbled on to a porn site when she was looking something up on the internet. I hated to think those images were even available to her yet they are easily accessible. I am all for SUPERVISED time on the internet, tracking where they go, etc. etc. You wouldn't let a 9 or 10 year old go to the Mall alone so why let them on the internet alone? BE AWARE...or at least as aware as you can be because I thought I was aware but when they grow up and tell you some of the things they got by you, well...let's just say TRY to be aware.

I am rambling but I know you guys want to know what's going on so here you have it. It's a lazy day for me. I am brain dead. Wizard is beside me snoring and a few minutes ago he was dreaming. Must have been a hell of a dream because he was moving parts of his body that I haven't seen him move lately. Maybe he was chasing a cat? Someone outside is mowing a lawn. Windows are open and breeze is delightful. I'm starting to feel hungry again so I'll need to get up and heat up the leftover broccoli and salmon I didn't eat last night. I am facebooked out as I commented on photos and status updates and watched linked youtube videos. I think I'll watch Gone With the Wind now as I eat my lunch. Maybe afterwards I will take a nap and when I get up, I might do something productive and then again, I might not. It's lovely to have the choice.

I hope you are having a day of doing whatever you want to do, even if it is absolutely nothing. Have no guilt and enjoy the moment! It is a great day to be alive in America and I expect a miracle! Remember, the best is yet to come. And so it is! Namaste!

Holding the resonance...

Resonance, according to Webster's Dictionary, is the quality or state of being resonant and when I looked up resonant it says "relating to or exhibiting resonance." So does that make anything more clear? Not to me! So, I looked up the word "resonate" and it was the closest to what I mean when I talk about holding the resonance and the definition is (drum roll, please!) "to relate harmoniously." Okay, so now that makes it a bit clearer, right? To relate harmoniously. So, if hope is one end of the spectrum and hopelessness is at the other, I am "holding the resonance" to "relate harmoniously" with the end of the spectrum that is HOPE. Okay, enough of that! I could go on and on and it would be "much ado about nothing" and overuse of quotes and inuendos.

So, let's get to the real stuff. I went to a staffing agency in Atlanta and met with a delighter Recruiter and redundantly completed an application on their computer system in the office which duplicated the information I had completed online at their website and the information I had provided in my attached e-mail of my resume and references. I spent an hour there, about 10 minutes of it with recruiter. At least the parking was free!

The Recruiter has forwarded my information to an HR Manager and it is another iron in the fire. With all the irons I've got in the fire now, it must be referred to as a bonfire and I am sure hoping a little spark comes back to me in the way of a job offer. This job search is a tiring process and it is becoming a habit to grab my computer first thing in the morning and send out a minimum of two resumes.

Before 8:00am I had already sent out my first two resumes as I enjoyed my daily latte. In the background, "New Moon" was on my TV and I paused to look at "Edward" whenever he came on the screen. Sigh! I want to be Bella! Now, I have "Twilight" on and they are just going to eat at the restaurant where she orders mushroom ravioli and Robert Pattinson sings in the background "Never Think." Ahh, sigh. I want to be Bella! I suppose fantasizing about Rob (oh, I know him so well!) is my escape from this difficult reality.

My children think my "obsession" (it's not really an obsession, just an interest) with Robert Pattinson is funny since he's about half my age (okay, at least) but it's not so much him (although he is truly luscious) but more the opportunity to REMEMBER a time when I was "holding the resonance" with another in "that" way. [So what IS with all the quotes today, Sabra?] The early 20's are a fantastic time (or they can be) in life, at least in retrospect. But, as it has been said, [okay, here go the quotes again, forgive me] "hindsight is 20-20."

So [Bella is just figuring out that Edward is a vampire] back to my reality... I have another interview in Atlanta today at 3:00pm and one in Roswell tomorrow at 9:30am. More irons into that fire! [Look of angst between Edward and Bella as she heads off into the forest and will confront him about being a vampire.] This job search has been a real eye-opener for me. I have been fortunate in my life to have found great opportunities and work for amazing men. I have worked for some women but they weren't as amazing (or fun to work with) as the men. My President's were strong, goal oriented, forward thinking, considerate, kind, respectful and, in their own way, sensitive and they loved me as much as I loved them and it was a great win-win situation. [Edward is showing Bella his "beautiful" skin that glitters like diamonds...oh, can I touch it just once????]

My affirmations for yesterday were: (1)I relax and trust life; (2)Life gives me all I need to be happy; and (3)Happiness is my natural condition. Yesterday, I resonated with happiness and as I went into the interview, I relaxed and trusted that only that which is for my higher and better good would occur. In one of my suit jacket pockets I had hope and in the other, I had faith. In the middle was happiness! [Edward: "You don't know how long I've waited for you."] I think when I finally get my REAL job offer, I will be saying "You don't know how long I've waited for you."

Time to start thinking about today's interview and to do my "morning work" to raise my resonance and find my harmony with the universe. [Bella: "I was unconditionally and irrevocably in love with him."] ["OH MY GOD!" as Edward and Bella walk into the school yard as a couple for the first time. Dang, he would stop me in my tracks if I saw him walking towards me. My mouth would go dry and I would be unable to talk and I would just stare at him, probably with my mouth open and drool dribbling down my chin!]

So, I think my resonance is up and my little mental excursion into the "Twilight" world has been fun this morning. It is OKAY to combine work and play...it's balance and I strive to maintain balance in my life (not that I always succeed but I try!).

Again, today I am taking faith and hope with me to my interview and I KNOW the Universe will provide because it always does. It is a great day to be alive in America and the best is yet to come! And so it is!

About whom or what do you think I am "wondering" today? [LOL] You would probably be more surprised than you'd imagine! Namaste!

There is always hope...

One of my favorite sayings is "Hope is the little bird who feels the sun and sings though the dawn be dark!" Holding to that hope has gotten me through some dark times and I was trying so hard to feel the sun and sing although my voice was cracking with the effort. The events of the past couple of months have really tested my faith and my ability to cling to that hope. I've felt like Rose from "Titanic," clinging to that piece of wood and realizing she has lost someone so close and dear to her heart and fearing she may not be rescued or even survive. But...she was and she lived on and so shall I!

I am always striving to live my life from a place of gratitude, faith in God and that "The Universe" will provide and part of the reason I try so hard is because I know that I am setting an example not only for my children but my friends who also face their dark times. I want to be a good example and live by doing and if I can help someone else then I am so joyful.

I had one of my darkest moments last week and an Angel came to my rescue and I realized that there have been many angels in my life and when I sat down to list them and to thank God for my many blessings, I realized that it wasn't as dark as it had seemed only moments ago. Nothing changed except my realization...my "feeling the sun and singing." Even in the midst of that dark moment, I was praying for the strength to accept that if what I wanted and needed to happen did NOT happen, then God certainly had something even better in store for me. I wasn't able to see it and when you're staring down a dark tunnel with no light at the end of it, it is hard to feel that sun and sing. Yet that is when we most need to sing the loudest because we need to hear our own voice singing.

I guess I've lived long enough to understand the meaning of living in the moment. I still want to have a plan, and I do. I have dreams and goals, even though I don't see the means to the end, I hang on to those dreams and goals. I understand that I have only THIS MINUTE, this RIGHT NOW and if I can just stay in it, keep doing the things that I know I need to do but staying in this minute, I can feel the sun. I can sing.

I accept the responsibility for my own life. I accept the responsibility for my own happiness. I also accept that I have made mistakes that have led me to place where I feel I am at the point of no return. That's when I have to remember that little bird and I remind myself to "Expect a Miracle." So many miracles have occurred in my life and the most recent one, totally unexpected, brought me to my knees. I could feel God upon me or maybe it was an angel wrapping her wings around me but I definitely felt something when I was "rescued" for a moment.

I am a strong person, a strong personality and I have a strong faith but I can't say that I never waver in any of things. Sometimes, it is OKAY to be rescued. It's like a rest or a pause and it is a leveling occurrence. Just like being on a teeter-totter it is important to be up as often as it is to be down because that's what makes it fun!

I have been very aggressive in my job search for the past two weeks. I had thought I was being aggressive before but I realize now that I was not pushing as hard as I could have and necessity being the mother of invention, I have been hard on it every day and am finally starting to see some benefits of my efforts. I expect that I will have the perfect job position for me within the next two weeks. I affirm it and so it is!

I have been in contact with a number of recruiters and what surprises me is that the level of professionalism exhibited and follow-up by many of them is much less than it was last time I worked with a recruiter. I think my age may be a factor but I have experience, health and a number of good "working" years left in me and there is hardly anything that I have not done as an Executive support person and as an Office Manager/Bookkeeper. I would hire me in a minute if I would looking for a support person. I have excellent customer service skills, I communicate well in writing and orally, I am dependable, trustworthy, discreet with confidential materials and I am loyal. Now what more could any employer want except that I be 10 or 20 years younger? I'd take the experience over the youth any day if I were in a hiring position, wouldn't you?

I will keep you up to date when that perfect job appears, as it will! I have interviews Wednesday and Thursday of this week and I've got several other irons in the fire so I know SOMETHING is going to happen for me soon because I can feel that sun and I am singing like a Lark!

Wishing you the warmth of the sun and the beauty of the song of a bird. Expect a miracle and don't discount it when it comes your way, because it will! It IS a great day to be alive and the best...is...yet...to...come!

I AM FEELING THE SUN AND SINGING, I AM!


Namaste